Realization
by Moony1972
Summary: COMPLETE! From the day Remus meets Tonks in OotP to when they get together. Watch as the two cope with their feelings, duties, and war, and see how it starts to shape their relationship. And, as an extra bonus, watch Sirius play matchmaker and help his two friends through their feelings. 100% canon (or as canon as possible).
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Harry Potter characters. Meh. Not like you thought it anyway.**

**A/N: Because I am bored and can't think of anything to write for my other stories, I decided to post this. And I am too lazy to think of a chapter name. So meh.**

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Remus sat next to Sirius at the next Order meeting, getting insanely bored. The first couple were fun; the thrill of being part of a secret organization used to make him forget about the blandness of each meeting. But now, as the Order was recruited together for the second time, that childish thrill was gone. To his left, he could see that Sirius was just as bored as he was _and _it didn't seem like he was planning on fixing it by pulling pranks like he used to. As Sirius constantly reminded him, it was no fun without Prongs. And Pettigrew had been part of the group beforehand, they _needed_ him to pull the best pranks. Yet now, there was no Marauders. There was no fun in the meetings.

Most of the Order members recalled this meeting as very similar to their first one. In fact, many were casting furtive glances towards Sirius and Remus, as if expecting them to pull of a prank like they had done sixteen years ago.

There was only one face in the crowd who's eyes were alight with excitement. One face who had not been there the previous time, the time when James had made everyone think they were going crazy. There was one face, of a new generation of Aurors. One face, who seemed to catch Remus' eye more than any other face in the crowd. One face, who hadn't made eye contact with Remus after learning about his lycanthropy. One face, whom Sirius seemed to have realized was catching Remus' eye quite a bit.

Sirius casually slumped back in his chair, whilst jabbing his elbow hard into his rib. Remus jumped, startled. He clearly hadn't realized he had been daydreaming.

"What the hell, Padfoot!"

Sirius shrugged his shoulders, quite pleased that he had got a reaction out of Remus. Rolling his eyes, Remus rested his head on Sirius, slowly lulling himself back into his fictional world. Sirius was not pleased. That face in the crowd, his cousin, was catching Remus' eye much too much.

"Come on, Moony," Sirius whispered, jerking Remus back into his own chair. Remus sent a glare in Sirius' direction. "Hey, don't give me that, now. I want to play a prank."

Remus rolled his eyes, somewhat disguising the fact they had lit up.

"What happened to pranks are no fun without four?"

"Shut up, I know you want to," Sirius said, grinning.

"No, I don't," Remus said stubbornly. "He could say something important."

"And we all know you aren't paying attention," Sirius pointed out.

Remus studiously ignored Sirius. He was _so _paying attention. It wasn't like he was focusing on a witch called Nymphadora Tonks. He _so_ had all his attention on Albus Dumbledore and his _spectacular_ speech on Voldemort's possible plans for attack.

Sirius rolled his eyes at Remus' antics; Remus had not changed at all since he was younger, no matter how much he tried to deny it. Remus already knew Dumbledore's theories by heart, they were mentioned at every meeting since the first Wizarding War. Sirius decided to inspect the Order as opposed to focus on Remus. He noticed many of them glancing towards him, and suddenly realized that much of the members of the Old Order were waiting for something exciting to happen. Sirius took it upon himself to give the public what they wanted. He made a big show of pulling out his wand and pointing it at Remus, but Remus didn't seem to notice. He waved it.

Sirius wasn't sure what had happened. All he knew was that his hair had turned pink and he was suddenly wearing green and silver robes. The young witch in the crowd, the one with bubblegum pink hair, peeled her eyes away from Dumbledore and stared at Sirius. She then caught eyes with Remus, who had a small, smug smirk upon his face.

"REMUS LUPIN!" Sirius shrieked.

Remus stifled a laugh and locked eyes with the pink haired witch. He grinned while the woman burst into laughter.

"CHANGE IT BACK!" Sirius demanded shrilly. All of a sudden, he didn't care if he sounded like a girl.

Remus turned around and looked at Sirius calmly, much to the amusement of the Order. Even Mad-Eye Moody had cracked a smile.

"Change what back, Sirius? I personally don't see any difference. Is it your hair? I think it looks rather becoming on you."

Sirius glared at Remus, who seemed to enjoy playing the role that he was confused.

"Remus. Lupin," Sirius said in a menacing manner. "I. Was. Hexing. You."

"I know," Remus said lightly. "But I'm not sure if you recall, I know it must be hard after over twenty years, but I remain unprankable."

Nymphadora Tonks watched this exchange with excitement. Her cousin and his friend were very amusing.

"Whatever, Moony, change it back."

Remus happily obliged. Except he didn't change it back to normal. Instead, Sirius' green robes now had writing on them: KING OF ALL SLYTHERINS; I LOVE YOU GUYS!

"MOONY!" Sirius exclaimed as he read his robes.

"Pardon me, Padfoot," Remus said, the mirth in his eyes plainly visible. "I do believe you were provided a wand? I think, correct me if I'm wrong, that you have the capability to do magic, as you have been practicing for the past week. Perhaps you should fix it yourself?"

"Last time I checked, you received a wand. Why don't you use it? I do believe you are capable. Or have you forgotten your magical learning?"

Sirius scowled, leaving Nymphadora Tonks in hysterics. Lupin's casualness, despite him being a werewolf, in this situation was very amusing. Maybe being a werewolf didn't affect one's sense of humour that much.

Sirius waved his wand, and to his horror, his robes stayed the same, but his hair was lined with rubber snakes. He was never one to give up, so without thinking, he tried again. His face was covered with green and silver makeup.

"REMUS JOHN LUPIN! I KNOW YOU DID THIS ON PURPOSE! FIX IT!"

Remus winked at the young witch before twirling his wand in his fingers.

"Oh, I don't know, Sirius. I may or may not have given a timer before you change back to your normal self."

Sirius kept the scowl etched onto his face, mainly to make the point that he most certainly hated his outfit.

"Looks lovely on you, Sirius!" the young witch called.

"Shut up, Nymphie," Sirius snapped, crossing his arms.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT!"

"Yeah Sirius," Remus said, with a cheeky grin. It turned out this Order meeting wasn't as bad as he thought it was. "Her name's _Nymphadora_," he continued, knowing full well that the young witch hated that name.

"LUPIN! TONKS! I want to be called TONKS!"

"_Honk_," Sirius said childishly, while pinching his nose.

_Tonks_ rolled her eyes and she turned around to face Dumbledore. Remus leaned against the messy Sirius.

"She's not so bad, is she?" he whispered.

"Get off me," Sirius hissed quietly as to not distract again from Dumbledore's speech. "I haven't forgiven you, you know. And what do you mean?"

Remus widened his eyes and started to stammer, "What I mean is...well...she'll be intimidating in battle, right?"

Sirius raised his brow while Remus blushed furiously.

"Why, yes, I should assume so, she is an Auror after all."

Remus nodded his head in agreement.

"We're being partnered for missions," Sirius pointed out as Dumbledore spoke.

"I know," Remus sighed. "Wouldn't it be brilliant if-"

"-the two of us were partnered?" Sirius finished off, knowing that Remus _did not _mean that. "I knew you loved me deep down!"

"Er, um," Remus stammered. "Yeah, exactly."

"And Mr Lupin and Miss Tonks, I want you to follow the Death Eater meetings taking place in the forest, and Mr Lupin, might I request to not play any pranks?"

Remus blushed slightly before grinning at Tonks, who laughed. Sirius eagerly waited to know what his assignment would be.

"And, Mr Black, you will be staying here."

"WHAT?" Sirius yelled, not for the first time. "Blasphemy!"

Dumbledore gave a sad smile.

"I see the love for that word as not disappeared over the years. I'm sorry, Mr Black, but with the Ministry after you and majority of the public, as well as Muggles after you, it would do well for you to stay here."

"Damn."

**A/N: Thoughts? This will be a short multi-chaptered fic. Maybe like three or four chapters. But that doesn't mean reviews aren't important!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: The next chapter!**

**Disclaimer: Just because a new chapter has been magically posted does not, by any means, mean that I have become JK Rowling. **

"Padfoot! I'm home! Nymphadora's with me!" Remus called as he entered Grimmauld Place.

"DON'T CALL ME NYMPHADORA!" Tonks yelled.

"MUDBLOODS! HALF BREEDS! FILTH AND SCUM IN THE NOBLE HOUSE OF BLACK!" the portrait of Walburga Black yelled. Sighing, Sirius walked over to the portrait and shut the curtains.

"I thought you didn't like Nymphie?" Remus asked, cocking his head.

"AUGH!" Tonks yelled out, ready to stomp away from Remus.

"MUDBLOODS! HALF BREEDS! FILTH AND SCUM IN THE NOBLE HOUSE OF BLACK!" Sirius glared at Remus as he forced the curtains shut again.

Unfourtunately, Tonks was never very good at making a dignified exit. She tripped over a corner table where a vase was planted, and that fell over. She whipped around and saw Remus stifling a laugh.

"Shut up, Remus," she mumbled. "I'm gonna go make us some lunch."

Tonks walked very slowly and carefully out of the foyer.

"Wait, NYMPHADORA!"

"MUDBLOODS! HALF BREEDS! FILTH AND SCUM IN THE NOBLE HOUSE OF BLACK!" Sirius let out a groan of frustration as he shut the curtains again.

"You'll make a mess!"

"I CAN COOK!"

"MUDBLOODS! HALF BREEDS! FILTH AND SCUM IN THE NOBLE HOUSE OF BLACK!" Sirius already had his wand out pointing at the curtain.

"Shut up, Remus," Sirius hissed, careful not to let the curtains open.

Remus widened his eyes when he remembered Sirius was standing at the top of the stairs.

"Oh, sorry, Padfoot!" Remus said, grinning widely. "Forgot you were there!"

Sirius walked down the stairs, glaring coldly at Remus.

"Seem to be doing that a lot lately."

"I'm sorry, Pads," Remus said softly, looking down at the floor.

"Save it," Sirius huffed as he walked into the sitting room. Remus followed.

Sirius flopped down onto a couch and Remus sat next to him. A rather uncomfortable silence ensued.

"To what do I owe this busy pleasure?" Sirius asked, effectively breaking the silence.

"I'm sorry, Padfoot-"

"-Sirius," Sirius rectified.

Remus blinked. "I'm sorry..._Sirius_."

"I said save it, Remus," Sirius retorted. "Or were my words that meaningless to you? I asked why you came."

Remus looked away from Sirius for a couple moments.

"I had a long mission from Dumbledore, that's all."

Sirius crossed his arms moodily.

"Must I have a reason to visit my brother?"

"Haven't really been that to you, now have I?"

Remus exhaled noisily.

"That's right, bored of me already?" Sirius sneered, though his eyes were full of pain. "Makes me wonder why I bothered breaking out of Azkaban."

Remus froze. Sirius had always taken care to forget any mention of Azkaban, the two liked to pretend that it had never happened. But now Sirius was casually throwing the term out.

"Where have you gone?" Remus asked, standing up and looking Sirius in the eye. "Where is the fun, hyper, prank-loving Sirius I used to know?"

"Lost with the dementors, his brothers gone," Sirius muttered, staring down at the ground.

"Padfoot," Remus said quietly, sitting next to Sirius and wrapping his arm around his shoulder. "I know this is hard for you, but-"

"What would you know?" Sirius spat, pushing Remus onto the floor. "You've never been stuck alone in a house, now have you? No, you got your perfect life."

Remus raised his eyebrows, not letting any of the insults Sirius gave affect him.

"You really think so?" Remus asked lightly. "I've been in hiding to avoid being caught, since - though it may have escaped your notice - I am a werewolf, while I've been thinking the last of my brothers who is alive is a traitor and caused all my friend's deaths, punishing myself for not realizing my closest brother's behaviour had changed."

Sirius looked at Remus sheepishly.

"I'm sorry, mate. I've just been so frustrated at home, all alone, while everyone goes on adventures..."

Remus smiled. "No hard feelings."

Sirius grinned and leaned back on the couch. Remus sat on Sirius' lap.

"Just like the old days, eh?" Remus said, leaning against Sirius.

"Missed 'em. Little Moony gonna have a nightmare now?"

Remus grinned and embraced Sirius, who hugged him back.

"Don't go all sappy on me now, mate," Sirius said, grinning. "Anyway, we must talk business."

Remus sat up and looked at Sirius.

"Business? You got a job?" Remus joked.

"Moony, shut up. Couldn't walk anywhere without being arrested, remember?"

"Yeah, yeah," Remus said, dismissing the topic with a wave of his hand.

Sirius pulled out his wand and started murmuring a couple of spells to soundproof the room.

"Uh, Pads?" Remus asked. "You aren't gonna murder me, are you?"

"No, Moony."

"Nothing possibly traumatizing? Well, other than seeing your face of course."

"MOONY!" Sirius exclaimed, widening his eyes. "Shut up!"

Sirius sat next to Remus, and slumped his arm over his shoulder lazily.

"So, how are you and Dora comin' along?"

Remus' eyes entered a dreamy state.

"Oh, she's brilliant. An excellent witch, if I ever saw one."

"Yeah...my cousin. Hey, she's got my good looks."

"Nah, she's nothing like you, Pads. She's, well, I don't know what to say other than brilliant..."

"Yeah, I reckon you two'd make a good couple."

Remus jumped out of his chair.

"I - what - no! We're friends!"

"With benefits?"

"Oh, Merlin, no! We, there are no romantic thoughts between the two of us."

Sirius smirked.

"Sounds like you are in DENIAL," he said in a sing-song voice.

"I am not in Egypt," Remus muttered.

Sirius grinned. "You can say it..."

"Look, we've been partnered for missions. We see each other in a platonic way, okay?"

Sirius gave a dramatic sigh and motioned for Remus to sit down again.

"If you insist, Moony."

"Guys, I'm done!" Tonks called, walking into the sitting room.

As she entered, it was clear that the room had been silenced. She undid the spell and peeped over the couch discreetly. There she saw Remus nuzzled against Sirius' shoulder; they looked to be in a rather intimate postion. She took a step back, but bumped against a picture frame on the wall, which fell over and knocked over a night table.

Remus and Sirius jumped up.

"Merlin, Dora, gave us quite a scare!" Sirius said good naturedly as he stood the table back right side up.

Remus grinned and helped Tonks lift up the portrait. However, he noticed that she seemed to be rather uncomfortable.

"Is something the matter, Nymphadora?" Remus asked softly.

Tonks shrugged. "Nothing. Lunch is ready."

Sirius and Remus exchanged glances. Tonks had not reprimanded them on the usage of her much hated name. Nonetheless, they tried to lighten the mood and get a reaction out of Tonks.

"Oh Merlin, I'd forgot you were cooking," Remus said.

Tonks looked back and shrugged again.

"I assure you, I can cook."

"Padfoot, am I correct in assuming that you prepared an antidote for food poisoning?"

Sirius smirked and pulled out two empty vials from his pocket.

"Oh Merlin help us all as we endure Miss Tonks cooking! But I only prepared two bottles. We can share, right Moony?"

Remus nodded and Sirius tossed a bottle to Tonks, who, much to their surprise, caught it.

They entered the extremely messy kitchen. Sirius and Remus exchanged more amused glances that had not gone unnoticed by Tonks. The three sat down at the table, but Remus and Sirius did not start eating until Tonks had cleaned half her plate.

"Are Moony and Padfoot pet names you guys have for each other?" Tonks asked suddenly, effectively causing her to drop her fork. Remus, as expecting the fork to have been dropped, picked it up, scourgified it, and then lay it back on Tonks' plate.

Sirius grinned at Remus, taking Tonks' statement quite literally, before saying, "Is that all what you've been thinking about? If you must know, they are pet names."

"Oh," Tonks whispered as she continued to eat.

Remus eyed Tonks curiously before turning to Sirius, who shrugged.

"What are you thinking about now, Nymphadora?" Remus asked carefully.

Tonks let a ghost of a smile cross her face.

"Don't call me that, Lupin," Tonks paused, examining both Sirius and Remus. "Are you guys gay together?"

The men in question burst into laughter. Tonks was unsure whether it was out of nervousness or not.

"I mean, it's okay, I didn't know. I heard rumours, of course..."

That effectively shut them up.

"Rumours?" Remus asked weakly.

"Moony and me being gay together?" Sirius asked, his face pale.

Tonks nodded mutely.

"No," the two of them said simultaneously.

"Who came up with that ludicrous idea? Blasphemy!" Sirius continued.

"Well, it wasn't _that_ far fetched," Tonks defended. "The looks exchanged, you guys are so touchy feely..."

"No," Remus said firmly, his cheeks going bright red. "I am not gay with Padfoot, or any other guy for that matter. We're just really good friends."

"Without benefits," Sirius added upon seeing Tonks' both relaxed and knowing look on her face. "Moony's my little brother."

Tonks relaxed and went back to eating her food quite calmly.

Sirius waggled his eyebrows at Remus, a knowing smile etched into his face. Remus stubbornly ignored it and ate his food calmly.

Eventually, Sirius couldn't stand the awkward silence that had come over the table and abruptly stood up.

"Leaving you two lovebirds on your own now."

Remus rolled his eyes and continued to eat while Tonks looked at Sirius, confused.

"Lovebirds?"

Sirius cast her a small smile. "You know what I mean."

Even after Sirius left, the painfully uncomfortable silence had not subsided.

**A/N: I know, nothing yet, I don't want to rush this too quickly. I'm sorry I didn't add much Remus/Tonks interaction. It'll start out with more Sirius, but eventually (4th chapter), we'll get more Remus/Tonks... **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Another chapter! I know, I can't think of any titles for these chapters, any help would be much appreciated :)**

**HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR FAVOURITE WEREWOLF, REMUS LUPIN!**

**Disclaimer: I'm sad too, I know, I really wish I were JK Rowling...Even with Polyjuice Potion I wouldn't be... :(**

"Kreacher, go make this again," Sirius demanded, grimacing as he swallowed his food. "This couldn't possibly be edible."

Kreacher sneered and gave an almost mocking bow.

"Of course, _master_."

Sirius rolled his eyes as his dreaded house elf disapparated with a snap and sighed as he picked up the copy of the Daily Prophet. Of course, there was nothing interesting in it, just the discussion on how _he _was responsible for the Azkaban escapees. Ha! As if he'd offer any help to _dear old Bella_. But the media did as they thought. They fed the public whatever they wanted to hear. They might as well not exist; society seemed to already be well rehearsed in the contents of the paper.

Sirius then reached over into his pocket and felt the edge of the two-way mirror he used to share with James. He contemplated calling Harry's name into it, but then decided that it would be too much of a risk. He half wished Harry would desperately need him and call his name into the mirror. That was part of the problem. He felt so unwanted, not only by majority of society, but his godson as well. He was supposed to be the only family Harry had left, but he seemed to be busy with school.

And Moony was too busy with the Order missions to come visit him. Too busy with his cousin. In fact, the only person who came to stop by Grimmauld Place was Snivellus, and that did not, by any means, count as pleasant company. It was starting to feel like he wasn't necessary in the world.

Suddenly he heard a _crack_; it sounded as if someone had apparated inside.

"Erm, Sirius?" a voice called, quiet enough as to not wake up the evil portrait of Walburga Black, and before Sirius could ask who it was, he heard the sound of his umbrella stand falling.

"MUDBLOODS! HALF BREEDS! FILTH AND SCUM IN THE NOBLE HOUSE OF BLACK!" Well, so much for quiet.

"Dora? Is that you?" Sirius yelled over the voice of the portrait while pulling out his wand.

"SHUT UP, YOU OLD HAG!" the voice yelled, and the sound of the curtains shutting firmly was heard.

"Dora?"

"Oh, Wotcher Sirius," the voice said, entering the dining room. "How you doin'?"

Sirius shrugged and forced a smile onto his face.

"Quite fine, thanks for asking," Sirius said. "So remembered your old Sirius after all, eh?"

Tonks ignored Sirius and sat down at the table.

"Where's the food?" Tonks asked.

Sirius sighed dramatically. "Kreacher is determined to starve me. I forgot to order edible food from him."

Tonks gave a small, shaky laugh.

"Erm," Sirius said, inspecting Tonks. "How are the Order missions goin'?"

"Good."

Tonks went back to sitting in silence. It was starting to make Sirius feel rather uncomfortable. So he went for a new tactic.

"_Nymphadora_," he said, drawing the name for an unnecessarily long time.

Tonks looked at Sirius. "Yes?"

"Wait, what?" Sirius asked, totally baffled. "Aren't you gonna correct me?"

Tonks shrugged.

"Well, er, how's Moony? Haven't seen him in a while," Sirius said, squirming uncomfortably.

"Good."

Sirius was starting to get desperate for a more than one word answer.

"Did you catch Voldemort?" Sirius yelled. Okay, maybe his question was a little nonsensical.

"Sirius, have you ever felt attracted to somebody?" Tonks asked suddenly.

"Er, what?" Sirius blurted out, taken aback. "What does that have to do with - oh. Erm, yeah, sure."

Tonks nodded and rested her elbows on the table. The room went silent once more.

"Why're you asking?"

"Oh, no reason," Tonks said, although even her Metamorphous skills couldn't hide her pink cheeks.

Sirius grinned, his whole bad mood forgotten. "Who's the lucky man, then?"

Tonks' cheeks went even redder.

Sirius widened his eyes. "Is it a girl?"

That snapped Tonks out of her shock.

"What? _No_!"

"So, who is it?" Sirius asked, starting to get impatient. He figured Remus would be happy, his old self was coming back.

"Okay, it's-"

_Crack_. Kreacher appeared in the kitchen.

"Your food, _master_," Kreacher drawled.

Sirius rolled his eyes and merely pointed to the table. Kreacher truly had terrible timing.

"Put it down there."

Kreacher did so and disapparated.

Tonks and Sirius began to eat in silence.

"Erm, Dora, you were saying..."

"Huh?" Tonks said, snapping out of whatever daydream she was in.

Sirius refrained from rolling his eyes at his cousin's antics. "The lucky guy you happen to be attracted to at the moment in time?"

"Er..." Tonks trailed off, now blushing profusely.

"Oh, come on, now!" Sirius all but shouted, quite exasperated. Embarassment and shyness did not bode well on Tonks _at all_.

Tonks remained silent. It was clear that Sirius should not have been the person whom she came to. Sirius was too impatient for her to actually open up to.

"Fine, I'll guess," Sirius paused, thinking very hard. "Me?"

Tonks stared incredulously at Sirius.

"Why, in Merlin's name, would I come to you for relationship advice if it were you I wanted to be in this relationship with?"

Well, at least she spoke like the old Tonks.

"It's pretty good tactic," Sirius pointed out.

"I'm _related_ to you. No, the so-called lucky guy is not you."

Realization dawned onto Sirius' face.

"Moony?"

Tonks stared hard down at the table, her hair starting to turn red as well.

Sirius grinned widely. "I _always_ knew he'd find a girl for himself one day!"

Tonks glared at Sirius.

"Well, _Nymphadora_," More glaring took place. "I don't seem to see what the problem is. Moony's single, you're single, so smooch! He _loves _outgoing girls!" To tell you the truth, Sirius had absolutely no idea of Remus' taste in girls. It wasn't like this was a common known fact that Remus decided to share.

Tonks was _this_ close to leaving the table, but unfourtunately, her insane cousin was the only person she could talk to about this.

"Look, Sirius," Tonks said after taking a deep breath. "I don't know what to say to him. What if he doesn't love me back?"

Sirius stifled a laugh. "You won't know until you tell him. I'm serious-"

Tonks smiled for the first time that day. "And I'm Tonks."

"Shut up, that's a bad pun," Sirius said, although he had burst into laughter. He really did like that pun. "Anyway, try it. He won't care."

"Well," Tonks said, now leaning against the table. "If, by the rare off chance, he _does_ want to, erm, well, you know...my parents won't approve."

"And that's why you came to me," Sirius said, the jovial smile still plastered on his face.

Tonks nodded.

Sirius flicked into help younger people mode. "It's what you truly believe in that matters, Dora. You can't live by what your parents believe, _especially_ if you feel like their beliefs are wrong."

"I don't _think_ being a werewolf makes the person a monster," Tonks whispered.

"And that is true. Some people are natural born monsters, like Fenrir Greyback, while some are the kindest people on Earth, and receive a curse for someone else's sin, like Moony. I can tell you that Moony is not a monster. He will _never _want to hurt you. If he felt he was in danger of hurting someone, he would leave. If Andy or Ted tells you different, you don't have to listen. I'm not going to generalize and say all werewolves are good, but you have to view them based on their personality, not on things they can't control. Judge them like you would any other person."

"I agree," Tonks said. "I think Remus is an excellent, sweet man, and I, er, I think, er, well, you know."

Sirius grinned. "Step one would be willing to admit it. Then only you'll be able to tell Moony. Tell him."

Tonks gave a small smile. "Thanks, Sirius. Wotcher."

As Tonks got up, Sirius panicked.

"Woah, woah, wait! You're leaving?"

"Yeah, Order stuff."

Sirius huffed. "Yeah, I'm sure."

"Really," Tonks insisted. "I'll visit soon."

"Okay, tell me how it goes. You're going to see Moony, I'm not stupid. Tell him 'hi' from me."

"Will do!" Tonks said, accidentally knocking over a chair.

Sirius set the chair back and watched as Tonks disapparated from his house. Fourtunately, he wasn't all alone for too long, he heard an owl screech and hand him a letter from his godson.

**A/N: And I was done the third chapter where I have once again failed to put Tonks and Remus in the same room together. Oops. Well, I hope you liked it. Er, and the next chapter doesn't have that either. But the fifth chapter will...I hope! Anyway, review.**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Et, voila! This chapter was the one that inspired me to write this story. It was going to be a stand alone, but then I decided to add to it. I hope you like it. **

**Disclaimer: You need to get both your eyes and brain checked out if you think I own Harry Potter or am making a profit on this story.**

To say he was wet would be an understatement. A very large understatement. He was more than wet. He was soaked. Drenched. But he wasn't in the mood to apparate. So he walked. In the rain. And he was wet. It was uncomfortable, but that was nothing compared to what he was feeling on the inside. He was shaking on the inside, and it wasn't due to the cold rain that he was. He had to talk to someone. Someone he could trust.

He walked to the doorstep of Grimmauld Place after checking multiple times with multiple spells if he were being followed. The sad part was that Remus was feeling nervous to go see Sirius. It had been a while. But it most definitely wasn't his fault that he seemed to have millions of Order missions; there just wasn't much time at all. Sirius would understand. Hopefully. Soon the war would be over and the two friends could go back to living their happy, carefree lives once again.

Today, though, Remus wasn't just going to meet Sirius to merely give him company. He was going there with a real purpose, that was eating the insides of his body when he kept it to himself. Had James been alive, he would have gone to see him, but alas, he wasn't, so Sirius was the next best thing. Remus gently opened the door and made his way to the sitting room, where Sirius often sat.

Sirius was staring into the flickering flames of the fireplace. If he had been talking to Harry, as Remus suspected, Sirius might actually be in a good mood. That was always a bonus when Remus was going to talk about something as serious as this.

"Padfoot?" Remus said quietly as to not startle Sirius.

Sirius did not turn around fast. Or very fast. He turned around in less than a split second, jumped off the couch, and all but tackled Remus with an embrace.

"Moony!"

The old Sirius was back! Something major had clearly happened during the span of time Remus had not visited to evoke such a personality back out of Sirius.

Remus smiled and sat on the couch next to Sirius.

"So," Remus started, eager to break the resounding silence that was brewing in the room. "What's up with you? Your house serving you well?"

Sirius snorted. "Nearly bored to death in this jail cell. Harry and I just had a fight; he's gonna stop writing."

Remus blinked. He thought Sirius seemed happy, but him fighting with Harry would _not_ make him happy. He decided to push this matter aside, he had important business to talk to with his best mate.

"Ah. Well, not much I am able to sympathize with. He never really liked me much. Always distant with me. Too much of a professor-student relationship, I'd reckon."

"Yeah," Sirius said, a smile flitting across his face. "So, much else happening in your life? The Order missions and stuff?"

Remus shrugged. "Same old adventures." It was becoming quite clear that professing his feelings was going to take a lot more courage than he had mentally prepared himself to muster.

"Yeah," Sirius sighed. Tonks hadn't come by his house yet, had she not said _anything_ to Remus? "You're, er, paired with Dora, right?" Sirius said after a moment.

Remus nodded.

"Are you going to say anything?" Sirius sneered, his bitter mood starting to return. "Like more or am I just not good enough for you?" Sirius had been trying really hard to suppress his bitter mood; he reckoned he was probably becoming like Snivellus. That would have to change.

Remus hesitated. "No, Pads, it's not that..."

Sirius smacked his hand on the couch in frustration. "So?"

Remus looked away from Sirius.

"Huh. Well, ya know, Moony? You only hesitate like this when you have something embarrassing to say. So spit it out! Merlin knows what I could do with a laugh."

Remus blushed as he turned back to Sirius. "You're going to laugh?"

Sirius' face softened, and his love for his little brother led his actions.

"Not if I shouldn't, or you don't want me to. Tell me."

Much to Sirius' disappointment, Remus remained silent.

"Damn it, Moony! You're so secretive!" Sirius' grey eyes widened as realization grew in them. He tried to act nonchalant about his discovery. "So, er, what's up with Tonks? Any relationship?"

"Er..." Remus could feel his cheeks turning a crimson red, similar to the colour of Lily Evan's hair.

"Come on, Moony!" Sirius exclaimed with as much eagerness as if he had just found a million galleons. "You could tell me!"

Remus took a deep breath, "ImightlikeermaybeloveNyphadoraTonks."

This sentence had taken a lot out of Remus both physically and mentally. However, it did not seem like Sirius agreed. He just stared at Remus, whose cheeks were growing redder. It was actually quite worrying.

"Come again?"

Remus shook his head and covered his face.

"Merlin, you're acting like a little kid!" Sirius threw his hands up, near wit's end. But he slowed down his mouth and started to think. This behaviour of Remus was very different from Remus on a normal day. It was starting to seem quite parallel to the situation he had just dealt with a couple weeks ago concerning one Nymphadora Tonks. "Do you love her? Is that what you said?"

Remus made a small, so small that it could have been easily overlooked, movement with his head. Being Remus' best mate, Sirius understood.

"That's great, Moony! I knew you had it in you!"

Remus looked Sirius in the eye and raised his brow.

"Er...what?"

"You fell in love! With _Nymphie_! We could be related!"

Remus sighed. "That's part of the problem. She won't love me back."

"Yeah...you're right..."

"SIRIUS!" Remus shouted, staring at the man in question in disbelief. "You're supposed to comfort me and tell me everything's okay and she'll like me and we'll be perfect! Not agree with me!"

Sirius hid the smirk threatening to form on his face.

"Oh. Well, what you said, then."

"SIRIUS!"

"I'm kidding, Remus, Merlin," Sirius paused as Remus calmed down. He decided that he was going to be loyal and _not _tell Remus about his conversation with Tonks. "No, really though, talk to her. She'd be cool with it. _But_ you have to be able to profess your love slowly and _without -_ and I mean it, Dora would not want to have this conversation - a fuss. So, let's practice!"

"Er, okay..." Remus started to speak in an excessively slow voice, deciding that this would sound quite lovely to Tonks. It wasn't rushed, so it must have showed he meant it, right? "I...looooooove...-"

It took Sirius all the self-control he could possibly muster to not laugh at Remus' sincereness in his attempt to profess his love.

"Honestly, Remmy! Say it with confidence. It'll be great. She's single, and has been working with you for a long time, _and _knows of your furry little problem so it should all be good!"

"But that's the problem! What if she doesn't like me in that way because I'm a werewolf? What if she only puts up with me because I'm in the Order and she has to? What if-"

"Merlin, so many questions," Sirius sighed, shaking his head. "Merlin, help me, this is gonna be a lot harder than I thought." Sirius turned to Remus and said in his most serious voice ever. "Nymphadora Tonks is not prejudiced against werewolves. And it's not like you're marrying her or anything. Just tell her."

"No!"

Sirius blinked. No? "Why ever not? For Merlin's sake, Remus, it'll be _fine_," he paused, thinking about what to say to Remus in encouragement, but not reveal the fact he had a conversation with Tonks. "I bet she likes you too. It's not possible to not to! Not after hanging out with you for as long as she does. Tell her. Admit it."

"Okay."

An awkward silence followed.

"Er, Moony?" Sirius said, his eyes growing amused. "Say it."

Remus rolled his eyes and stood up. "I'm leaving now."

Sirius' eyes betrayed his face in hiding his disappointment. He would never know whether this be the last time he saw Remus, not with the dangerous missions he and Tonks were going on. He wanted Remus to stay with him, safe, forever. He didn't want to have to live in the fear that Remus could die the next day. Knowing the war was getting more and more hectic, every goodbye seemed to have more meaning to it. But now wasn't the time to put a damper on the mood. He would ignore the morbid thoughts that were coming into his head.

"Oh. Okay," Sirius said dejectedly.

Remus smiled, oblivious to what Sirius was thinking. "Word of advice, Padfoot? Or wisdom, whatever you want to call it?" Sirius looked up, reminiscing about the times Remus would give him these everyday at Hogwarts. "Stop calling for Merlin."

Sirius grinned. "Right. Well then, until...later, I suppose."

Remus nodded and took a deep breath as he turned around.

"I love Nymphadora Tonks," he said loudly and clearly just before he apparated.

Sirius laughed.

"Well, now that that's sorted out...huh, it seems like I'm here for advice now. Every man's dream..."

Feeling much happier than he did before, he pulled out a piece of parchment to write to someone special.

**A/N: I hope that was good. This, along with one of the future chapters, was my favourite to write. It makes me smile, and I always thought Remus would start to freak out when he started to feel love for the first time. Anyway, review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Drumroll please! Remus and Tonks actually are going to communicate in this chapter! Can you believe it? No? I couldn't either.**

**Disclaimer: I can't even say I own the plot :( This is just filling in the scenes that weren't shown involving Remus and Tonks based on JK Rowling's books and bio of Remus.) There are a couple quotes taken from Rowling's biography.**

It was after a mission. Remus was too tired to go back to Sirius' place. How in world would he actually force himself to admit to Sirius that he _still_ had yet to confess to loving Tonks to her. And today, he seemed to have the perfect opportunity.

Tonks was sitting on the bench in her backyard. What had happened to her? She fell in love, and she was too shy to admit it! She was pathetic. She couldn't muster the courage to go back to Sirius for help, when it was quite clear she was incapable of communicating her feelings with the man she loved. But it wasn't like she hadn't been obvious. She was always flirting with Remus, batting her eyelashes, heck, was the pink hair not enough hint? She sat on the bench, brooding over this terrible disaster, when she heard footsteps. She turned around, and saw a tired, sandy haired man walking over to her. Today was the day. Today was the day she would directly share her feelings with Remus. _  
_

"Hey Dora," Remus said, the joy in his quiet voice was very much evident.

Tonks smiled and shifted over to the end of the bench, leaving quite enough room for Remus.

"How many times must I remind you to _not_ call me Dora?"

Remus took a seat, draping his arm over the back of the bench. He shifted over, closer to Tonks, and could feel his face grow very warm.

Remus gave a small pout. "What is this? Tonks is what everyone calls you. Can't I be any different?"

Tonks stared at Remus, a small smile playing on her lips.

"You are different, Remus."

Remus shrugged his shoulders, and let them slump a little.

"Yeah, I know I am."

Tonks groaned. Obviously he had to take every bloody thing she said in the wrong way! She was trying to _flirt _with him, for Merlin's sake, and now he started brooding over one of her pick up lines!

"Not in that way, Remus."

Remus looked up, looking into the dark, twinkling eyes he'd never be allowed to own. He _had _to admit his feelings; it shouldn't be so hard! What was there to lose?

Remus rolled his eyes. "If you truly think that, you don't have to change your beliefs because I happen to be your partner. I'm used to it. I'm different from every person on this planet."

Tonks grew very frustrated. "Why do you have to take every bloody thing I say in the wrong way?"

"Because most of the time, my interpretation is correct," Remus said simply.

Tonks leaned in to Remus. "Not with me, Remus. Not with me. Not with a friend."

Remus smiled, although it seemed a little forced. He was glad he was being accepted by Tonks, of course, but he could only wish she looked at him more than just a friend. Not that he was expecting anything more, but it would be nice if she would return his feelings.

"Well, I really should get going," Remus said, deciding that he was not going to be able to pick a time to be able share his love for Tonks today. Perhaps another day, if he were _really _lucky.

"Where're you going?" Tonks asked, sitting up.

"Grimmauld Place."

Tonks smiled. "To see my cousin? I haven't seen him in ages."

"Yeah," Remus paused. "I've kind of been avoiding him."

"Same, actually. His temper."

Remus gave a bitter smile.

"Probably makes me the worst friend ever," he muttered. "The guy breaks out of Azkaban, and the person who's supposed to be there for him and help him has been trying to avoid him," he sighed. "I'm the reason for his temper."

"Remus!" Tonks said, giving him a small hug. "Don't think that way! Everything has just been so hard, with the war and all."

Remus shrugged his shoulders. "Yeah, I suppose. Well, Sirius is very strong. Having survived for so long, I mean."

"You're strong too," Tonks pointed out. "You've survived so long without anybody there for you."

Remus gave a hollow laugh. "Not as strong as Sirius. If you ignore his eyes, his face has started to look fuller, happier..."

Tonks nodded her head. "Yeah. He still handsome, isn't he? Even after Azkaban."

Remus abruptly stood up, crossing his arms and kicking the bench. Of course Tonks had not fallen for someone younger, but for his best friend.

"He always got all the women," Remus spat, wallowing in self hatred.

Tonks' hair suddenly grew to a deep red; she looked very, _very _angry indeed. What was wrong with this man? All the signs were there, and he goes off and _always_ assumed the worst.

"You'd know perfectly well who I've fallen for, if you weren't too busy feeling sorry for yourself to notice!" she exclaimed.

Remus' face contorted to one of ecstasy, and then one of sullenness. He couldn't date Tonks! He would end up having to hurt her, because of his...condition.

Remus mocked confusion. "Erm, what do you mean?"

Tonks narrowed her eyes in disbelief. Did Remus really think she was that thick? She grabbed the hem of his robes and started to shake them.

"It's you!"

Remus raised his eyebrows. "A little outgoing there, aren't you? Well," he hesitated before taking a deep breath. "I harbour no such feelings for you, _Tonks_."

"No! You love me! I know you do!" Tonks all but screamed.

"Tonks, I assure you. I am much too old and poor for you. You deserve someone young and whole. You are too young for me to fall for," Remus said calmly.

Tonks looked up at Remus.

"You're not all that good a liar, you know," she pointed out.

"So I've heard," Remus muttered. "Tonks, I must get back to Grimmauld Place."

Remus started to walk away.

"Tonks?" Tonks whispered, gradually getting louder. "Tonks? It's never been Tonks, Remus!"

She knew Remus heard - he had bloody werewolf hearing! - but it was plainly obvious that he was ignoring her.

"I know you love me too!" Tonks said, furiously wiping the tears that had formed on her face. "I know you do!"

Remus didn't give her a second glance. He couldn't. It was for her own good.

**A/N: Sorry for the late-ish post. Anyway, thoughts? Reviews are nice. **


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Enjoy! Thank you for the lovely reviews! This chapter wasn't long enough, but I liked where it ended, so I left it. **

**Disclaimer: If I owned Harry Potter, Remus would be in the series a whole lot more. **

When Sirius heard the sound of someone entering his house, he did not, by any means, expect to be in the situation he was in at the moment.

Remus entered the house quietly and walked to the sitting room.

"Padfoot?" He called quietly.

Sirius turned around.

"Moony, mate," Sirius said, forcing a smile onto his face.

Remus flopped down onto the couch next to Sirius. Sirius had been very much confused indeed.

"Moony," Sirius said, using his 'comforting' tone. "Is everything alright?"

Remus let out an audible groan.

Sirius could feel the gears going off in his head. What made Remus act this way? Or better yet, who? The answer was quite clear.

"Is everything alright between you and Dora?" Sirius asked.

"Simply spiffy," Remus muttered.

Sirius blinked. Remus only used the word 'spiffy' when things were definitely _not _spiffy. But something wasn't adding up. He was positive that Nymphadora had come by to his place and confessed that she loved Remus. He hadn't imagined her walking into his house, had he? That would be quite unnerving. Sirius figured he should check.

"Moony, Remus, mate, did you tell her how you feel about her?"

Remus looked at Sirius and shrugged. Sirius decided to take that as a yes.

"Did she not feel the same way?" Sirius asked, any sour mood he had been feeling previously was gone, replaced with worry for his brother.

Remus stared down at the floor. Sirius leaned against Remus in a big brother fashion.

"Look, I'm really sorry; I was certain that Dora'd—"

"—That's not the problem," Remus interrupted, sitting up straight.

Sirius was baffled. Since when had his friend become so bloody confusing?

"Wait, what? What's the problem, then?" Sirius asked, looking Remus directly in the eye.

"That she loves me," Remus said, after hesitating for a couple of seconds.

If Sirius was confused before, that was nothing compared to how he felt now.

"But I thought your fear was that she wouldn't...Remember, last time we met, 'bout a month ago, and I had to comfort you...and there's no problem. If she has feelings for you, that's excellent, isn't it?"

Remus gave a loud and dramatic sigh. Sirius, being the amazing friend he was, gave an amused chuckle. Remus was back to acting like a moody teenager.

"Okay, your problem is that she loves you. Isn't that what you need for a perfect relationship? Both parties confessing their feelings for one another? Unless," Gears were rapidly turning in Sirius' head. "Unless you're over Dora?"

"No! No, of course I'm not over her!" Remus exclaimed hysterically.

Sirius raised his eyebrow. "I honestly don't see what the problem is." Remus looked exasperatedly at Sirius. "Okay, okay, don't get your wand in a knot! Why don't you tell me what happened?"

Sirius couldn't help but feel that the roles between him and Remus had been switched from when they were at school. Before, Remus used to be depressed, but he'd be there like a professor to help when Sirius had problems with girls. It was quite clear that neither understood how to handle their new roles.

Remus explained exactly what had happened earlier. Sirius had been affronted when Remus had been jealous of him ("As if I'd do that!" he had exclaimed.), but laughed when Remus explained how outgoing Tonks was. By the end of it, though, Sirius was very disappointed in his little brother.

"So, for stupid, noble reasons, you told Dora that you don't love her," Sirius repeated, staring at Remus.

"I can't love her," Remus muttered quietly. "I _can't _love her, Padfoot. I'd have to hurt her. I'm too old, too poor, and too dangerous for her to be around."

"That's bullshit and you know it, Moony," Sirius snapped. "She knows the consequences, if she likes you, why do you have to lie and hurt her feelings at the same time?"

"I _shouldn't _like her anymore than a friend, Padfoot! I'll give her false hopes! You did the same thing in school!" Remus accused.

Sirius blinked, and looked at Remus with a disbelieving look on his face.

"That was school," Sirius pointed out, narrowing his eyes. "This is life. You had no right to hurt Dora like that."

"I'm helping her!" Remus snapped. "She deserves someone young and whole, and I most definitely don't fit that description."

Sirius stood up, looking personally insulted.

"Remus! I refuse to cover up for you. You walk up to her _right now _and tell her how you truly feel," Sirius demanded.

Remus slammed his hand on the couch as he stood up and glared at Sirius.

"One would hope you'd see my side of things. I couldn't live with the guilt, _Sirius_."

"I refuse to help someone who couldn't set aside his bloody pride for a girl who loves him for who he is!" Sirius said with an equal amount of venom.

"I don't even know what made me think for a second that you could help me, Black," Remus hesitated, his face flushing with anger. "I'm leaving."

"Thank Merlin!" Sirius said, deliberately trying to infuriate Remus in his anger.

He heard the door shut with a defiant slam, leaving Sirius to his scrambled thoughts. He was mad as hell at Remus, yet Sirius knew this was how Remus acted when he was mad. The way to help him out of his guilt was to talk calmly and rationally about it, not tell at him back. Sirius had failed at his job as a friend. Instead of making it easier for Remus and Tonks to get together, he had yelled at him. He had fought with Remus. It would take forever to get Remus to open up to him again. He had ruined his chance to get Remus to see sense. Who knew? Remus could end up hurting Tonks more, and there was nothing he could do about it because he couldn't control his temper. He was a bloody failure.

**A/N: Thoughts? It wasn't going to end up this dark, but I'm in the midst of some family issues, and this was the outcome. I suppose it's kind of in character, though. Please review. I love hearing your thoughts. **


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Here you go! A really quick update. I hope you like it. **

**Disclaimer: I know, it's sad. None of us are JK Rowling (I think...O_O) thus none of us own the Harry Potter characters...**

Tonks was crying. Tonks never cried. But Tonks was crying. Sirius was panicking. Sirius had no idea what to do with crying girls, let alone a crying Tonks. And Sirius knew it was all Remus' fault. But there was nothing he could do. He also realized that it was taking a lot out of Tonks to cry in front of someone, but, at the end of the day, who else would she go to?

"Ssh," Sirius muttered. "It's okay."

Tonks clutched onto Sirius' robes desperately, as if she were five once more.

"Stop crying, there's nothing to cry about," Sirius continued to mutter, getting rather uncomfortable. Had he mentioned that he had no idea how to handle crying girls?

"He's going to die!" Tonks wailed, burying her face against Sirius' chest.

"How's he gonna die?" Sirius asked softly, although his face grew with worry. Die? He hadn't seen Remus for quite a while, but he hadn't realized he was going to die.

"He's trying to, Sirius! There's nothing I can do!"

"What? Remus, suicidal? I assure you, Dora, this is just a phase. He's strong, he won't run away from life," Sirius said, dismissing the fact as he rubbed Tonks' back, trying with all his heart to get her to stop crying.

"He is! He's not outrightly doing it, but I can tell!" Tonks bawled, holding Sirius tighter.

"Ssh, Dora, it's okay."

Tonks sniffed. "I'd expect you to show more love for your friend, Sirius. He's going to die."

"Look, Nymphie, I've no idea what you're talking about," Sirius said rationally. "You've walked in here, started weeping against my chest, and the next thing you tell me is that Moony is going to die. I need an explanation."

"He just hates me," Tonks whispered. "That's why he's killing himself."

And that sent Tonks in a new wave of tears.

"Please, Dora, stop crying," Sirius pleaded. "You're making some big points and I can't understand them because you're crying..."

"I don't want him to die," Tonks moaned in between sobs. "I want him to love me. Not die."

Sirius decided to give Tonks a few minutes to calm down before he attempted to get any coherent information out of her.

Tonks gave one last sniff before she stepped away from Sirius.

"I'm sorry," she said, as she got off of Sirius and rested her head upon the couch.

"It's fine," Sirius said, readjusting his position to get comfortable to the sudden decrease in weight. "You know how I am, extremely comforting and there when people need them. I've had plenty of experience in the past year."

Tonks gave a small smile. "Because of me?"

Sirius laughed. "Quite self absorbed, are you not? No, I've a godson, a little brother, and now you."

Tonks looked grim and sombre once again. "Your little brother is killing himself."

Given Tonks' unusual sombreness, Sirius found himself getting more worried over comforting.

"What is he doing?" Sirius asked, trying to keep his voice even and hide the panic in his tone.

"He's going for the most dangerous missions!" Tonks blurted out.

"What? But I thought he was partnered with you," Sirius said thoughtfully.

"He was, but he quit, Sirius! He didn't want to be partnered with me! Then he walked right up to Dumbledore and took up the offer for tailing Death Eaters! He's going to die! He's trying to kill himself!" Tonks complained, looking more than just a bit worried.

Sirius widened his eyes. "He couldn't! He wouldn't!" But then again, Sirius did not really know what Remus would want. When Remus was stressed and nervous, there was no knowing what he would do.

"But he did, Sirius! He did!"

"The idiot's trying to run away," Sirius scowled.

"I don't care! But I want him to live! I love him, Sirius!"

"It's okay, Dora," Sirius murmured, however he looked just as troubled as Tonks.

"He's doing this because of me," Tonks whispered.

"Ssh," Sirius said, giving Tonks another awkward hug. "Remus'll be okay."

There were a few moments of an uncomfortable silence. Tonks couldn't think. All this seemed so surreal. Remus, _her_ Remus, was trying to make himself suffer because of her. This was nothing like the fantasy she had imagined. In hers, Remus admitted his feelings and they were dating. It didn't seem like that was every going to happen.

"He hates me," Tonks said softly. "He wouldn't be doing this if he loved me. I was so certain, Sirius, so certain that he loved me back. But he hates me."

"Blasphemy!" Sirius exclaimed, pushing Tonks away from him. "He's doing this because he loves you, I'm sure."

"By hurting himself?" Tonks asked, staring at Sirius disbelievingly. "He's trying to avoid me!"

Sirius stared at Tonks, who was looking rather vulnerable. It was odd to see Tonks looking like this.

Suddenly he jerked up, "Sod nobleness!"

Tonks looked up at Sirius, confused. "What?"

Sirius took a deep breath. He knew he was about to betray his friend's secret, but if it were to help Tonks stay happy, he would do it. Tonks was weeping for Remus, and he was acting like he didn't give a damn. It was for the best.

"Look, Dora, I really shouldn't be saying this, it's a secret, but you can't tell anybody."

Tonks seemed to look as if she knew what was coming, yet she looked at Sirius intently, hanging on to his every word.

Sirius squirmed uncomfortably, but he continued. "Remus came in to talk to me, and he confessed that he loves you," he paused to let Tonks soak up the information. "About a month ago, he told me that you told him you loved him, and he wasn't worthy of your love so he had to protect you, since he loved you so much. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I do not believe he used the word 'hate' or 'dislike' during our conversations."

Tonks' eyes considerably brightened. "He feels the same way?"

Sirius couldn't help but chuckle. "He does. Like a match made in heaven, if you ask me."

Tonks' mood was visibly lighter, as she began to laugh. Sirius, however, didn't quite understand why she was laughing, and so he asked her so.

Tonks took a few seconds to sober up before replying.

"I never realized you were playing matchmaker. Have the both of us really went to you?"

Sirius grinned. "Yup. Luckily not at the same time, that really would have been awkward. But that's what I mean, a match made in heaven. Trust me. I've experience in this field. I had to deal with Prongs and Evans for the longest time."

Tonks smiled. "I won't give up on Remus then."

"Don't," Sirius advised. "He'll come through. You'll see."

Tonks' smile disappeared. "I just hope he doesn't get himself killed in the process."

"You should talk to him."

"Oh, and that worked out _great_ last time," Tonks said sardonically. She continued before Sirius had the chance to retort, though. "I'll talk to him. I just need him to not walk off when I try."

Sirius snickered. "That's Moony for you!"

Tonks gave a small grin, and Sirius and her were sharing a comforting moment until they caught sight of Kingsley's patronus.

"Order meeting, Hogwarts. Black stays home," Kingsley's voice echoed around the room.

Tonks frowned while Sirius stared at where the patronus had been, rather affronted.

"I've got to go," Tonks said, getting up very carefully as to not drop anything.

"So I heard," Sirius sighed.

"See you soon," Tonks said just before she disapparated.

Sirius leaned against the couch, his eyes becoming distant.

"Moony," he whispered, praying that Remus could hear him. "Please don't kill yourself to protect Dora. She loves you. I want you both to live happy lives. For me."

**A/N: Review? And do you think I should switch the genre of humour to angst? Or humour?**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Next chapter! You guys are probably going to hate me for this, but oh well. Don't say I didn't warn you. I said this would be canon, didn't I? Thanks for the reviews. This chapter was hard to write, which is why it took so long. But it's pretty long compared to the other chapters, so enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own this plot. Or the characters. Or anything. If I did, this chapter would have _never_ taken place.**

The next Order meeting was very tense. Even those who had no idea what was going on between Remus, Tonks, and Sirius could feel the tension. Sirius was glaring at Remus, Tonks was looking pleadingly at the same boy, while Remus was busy pretending Tonks did not exist. The only person who was completely oblivious to the current predicament was Severus Snape, but that was probably because he was not present at the meeting.

"There is evidence, from Mr Potter, that Voldemort is at large, and is heavily recruiting. The Ministry, of course, as we all are well aware, continue to blame the escapes from Azkaban on Sirius Black," Dumbledore lectured.

"Why bother telling us if we know already?" Sirius muttered, crossing his arms. "We could be doing more important things."

"As there are new escapees, I will have to contact you secretly with future missions, to make sure we aren't being tailed or spied upon. I would rather one mission be known by Voldemort rather than all," Dumbledore continued, plainly ignoring Sirius, as he had had much practice when he was in school. "We shall partner ourselves up again. Since Mr Black is not going to be participating," Sirius gave a small groan. "We will have one person working alone."

Tonks stood up immediately. "I would like to work with-"

Remus stood up. "-I volunteer to be the one working alone, Professor."

Sirius put his head in his hands, while Tonks looked frustrated. Remus, however, was only focused on Dumbledore, who gave a small nod.

"I believe that sounds good. Now, this meet-"

"No," Tonks said, loudly. "I want to work with Remus."

"I do believe I asked to work alone," Remus said, a small fire burning in his eyes.

Dumbledore looked slightly confused; it was quite clear that he was able to sense the tension between Tonks and Remus. However, he decided that it would be better for Remus to work alone if he were doing it for the greater good. So, he gave a nod to Remus. He then gave a signal which signified that the meeting was dismissed.

Most of the Order members were quite in a rush to get out of the meeting _as soon as possible_; meetings tended to be rather difficult when they was tension between three rather obsequious members. All of the Order had left, while Remus was trying to pack his papers up, which seemed to have got scuffled all over the floor. Chances of it being because of Sirius was rather high, although it would never be known for certain. After he _finally_ got his bag packed, he prepared to apparate, but Tonks pulled on his arm.

"Stop clutching my arm, Tonks," Remus said, his face stoic.

"No," Tonks said simply, and rather coldly. She took a deep breath.

"What is the matter with you?" she asked, looking hysterically, and rather comically if the given circumstances weren't so dire, near tears. "Why...why are you doing this? You know I love you! How is this dealing with matters in any way? It's stupid! You're hurting me!"

That was apparently the wrong this to say. Although Remus continued to keep his face blank, those words hit like a knife in the heart. It was inevitable. He would hurt her regardless of what he did. He needed to cut off all ties of possible relationship with Tonks.

"My arm."

This, if anything, infuriated Tonks even more. "Your _arm__? _Are you even _listening _to _me_? Or _yourself_? You're being so dumb! So emotionless..." Tonks had to bite her tongue to keep her from saying anything she might regret; she almost called Remus a monster. From the look on Remus' face, she guessed that Remus already knew, but then again, she could blame it on him being paranoid. There was no proof. "I know you care, Remus. I know this hurts you."

"What do you know?" Remus spat, yanking Tonks off his arm. "My life is more arduous than you think!"

Tonks refused to allow herself to be shoved off without retaliation, so she pushed Remus to the ground. He didn't fight back. There was an almost longing look in his eyes, but sheer nobleness was stopping him. This was too much for Tonks, she started getting more furious, and she couldn't hold back her emotions any longer.

"You're stupid, _Lupin_. One would think you'd set aside your pride for love," she sneered. "Talk to me when you can set your stupidity aside...not sure if you can grow out of it. You don't care about anyone, you have no heart!"

As soon as she said this, Tonks regretted it. But she couldn't take it back. She didn't know what to do, how to keep her mouth from saying more things she didn't mean, so she did the first thing that came to her mind. She stormed out of the house raucously.

Remus glared at the spot she was in, before he got up, trying in vain to hide the hurt in his eyes from the one witness of the fight. He grabbed his wand and prepared to apparate, when he was knocked back down to the ground again.

"What the hell is wrong with you, _Remus_?" Sirius asked, looking rather threatening.

Remus had not wanted a confrontation with Sirius; the last time they spoke, they had an argument, and Remus wasn't exactly in the mood to deal with the escapee from Azkaban at the moment.

"What do you think?" Remus retorted, standing up.

"I think you're being cruel," Sirius claimed. "It's dumb. This situation is dumb. Instead of treating it like the clear, ideal situation you would want involving love, you're going ahead and ruining it."

"Can it help if I love her, and don't want to ruin her life by some stupid, juvenile crush?" Remus asked, dismissing Sirius' fact. "...Black."

Sirius tried to ignore the fact Remus had just broken Marauders' Code by addressing him by his surname.

"Juvenile?" Sirius asked incredulously. "Juvenile? I can assure you that Tonks is well aware of any consequences she would have by marrying you-" Sirius was interrupted by Remus.

"Marrying? That's not what she asked. She wanted a basic relationship."

"You're not even giving her that, Remus."

"I don't want to hurt her! I'm not as reckless and _remorseless_ as you, Black."

"You are hurting her!"

"Exactly! It's a damn lose-lose situation for me, let me take the lesser of two evils. I'd rather not make her an outcast."

"So making her sink into a depression is helping matters a ton," Sirius said sardonically, getting more and more frustrated by the second. Remus was being so...stupid!

"It's not like you know-" At this moment, the two heard some sort of shriek from upstairs. Remus looked questioningly, while Sirius' eyes widened.

"Buckbeak..." he whispered, and rushed up the stairs.

Remus, although he would rather leave, was curious to see what had occurred, so followed Sirius upstairs. They found Buckbeak injured. Sirius knelt down by the hurt hippogriff and started to coax it.

"It'll be okay, Beaky...I'll fix it up for you..." Sirius said soothingly, petting the hippogriff before he stood up slowly.

Remus couldn't help but sneer; all the stress was getting to him, and he was taking it all out on Sirius.

"Aw, you _poor_ thing," Remus said sardonically, directing his statement at Sirius. "Your _hippogriff's_ hurt, _oh_ the horror."

Sirius glared back.

"At least I have feelings for others, I can _sympathize _with them," he shot back. "Unlike you, who doesn't give a hoot about any other person in this room but himself."

"That is not true!"

"Oh, but I think you'd find it is. You're the most selfish person I've ever had the misfortune to meet."

And with that, Sirius marched out, looking for some first aid supplies to help tend to Buckbeak.

Remus was breathing heavily, but he couldn't handle the tension. He apparated back to his small place. He tried _really_ hard to calm himself down. He just couldn't have a relationship with Tonks, he just _couldn't_. It would prove terrible for her. He was a grown man, and it was his job to help take care of her. Marrying her, or having anything more than a basic affinity towards Tonks, would put her life in danger, and it would be because he was reckless. He deplored taking out all his emotions on Sirius, though. He would gather the courage and apologize to Sirius tomorrow, it would make everything easier. Then, hopefully, Sirius would take the time to hear his side of the matter out.

* * *

Tonks moped on the couch. Of course the man she loved would never want to spend any time with her willingly anymore. She had gone ahead and blew her opportunity. At least there was still Sirius. Sirius would eventually assist her in making Remus see sense; he fully supported the relationship, and would give his blessings as soon as the time arose. She would talk to Sirius tomorrow and together they would make a plan. He was always there for her, so easily accessible. She just wished, with all her heart, that it wouldn't be too late by the time Remus saw sense. With the war raging outside, either of them could be dead, and Remus would have never expressed his true feelings. But she wouldn't think that. The two of them would live.

She would have continued to brood over her thoughts, but a patronus had shown up in her house.

"Emergency Order meeting," surprisingly Snape's voice boomed, the sound bouncing off the walls. "Harry Potter is in trouble."

* * *

In all the panic, no one seemed to be worrying over their own issues anymore. They all seemed to be very worried about the one they were all fighting for.

"Harry Potter is in trouble. Voldemort has summoned him to the Department of Mysteries," Dumbledore said.

There was a collective gasp. Sirius looked very worried indeed.

Snape spoke up. "He seems to think that Black was caught."

Sirius widened his eyes. "Why didn't he come here?"

"He must have," Remus said quietly, looking down at the floor. "When you were tending Buckbeak. You probably didn't hear him, so he thought you weren't there." Remus looked very guilty indeed, he was blaming himself for the problem. Had he stayed a couple more minutes and didn't let his emotions overpower him, he wouldn't be such a monster, and would have been able to hear Harry from the fireplace.

"Now it's too late to be thinking of any of that," Dumbledore said, cutting Remus off from his guilty thoughts. The twinkle in the blue eyes seemed to have gone out. "We must head to the Department, we all know that the prophecy is in there."

There was the sound of cracking from apparating by a lot of people. Sirius was doing so, but was stopped by Snape. Remus was the only other person who hadn't left yet.

"Black, you should stay back. It's too dangerous," Snape said, still sounding bitter.

"What? Are you trying to make me some sort of coward so you can rub it in my face later?" Sirius retorted heatedly.

"Stop it, Sirius," Remus said. "Perhaps it is better."

"No one asked you, _Lupin_," Sirius said, scowling.

With a hurt look in his pale, green eyes, Remus apparated to the Department.

"I'm trying to help you, Black," Snape said.

"Yeah, well, I don't need it, Snivellus."

"If something happens to you, what'll Potter do?" Snape asked, cocking his head slightly.

Sirius' thoughts first jumped to James, forgetting that he was dead, before realizing that Snape meant Harry. Damn him for trying to replace Harry with James.

"Fine," he said after a couple of moment. "Fine. You win."

Snape gave a curt nod. "Just inform the others when they arrive."

Snape apparated, and Sirius made a mocking face to the empty air, which was where Snape had been standing.

"KREACHER!" he called.

"Yes, master?" Kreacher appeared immediately.

"Inform the other members of the Order that we are battling in the Department of Mysteries."

He didn't wait to see Kreacher bow; he apparated before anyone could bat an eye.

* * *

Remus was duelling Lucius Malfoy, who, in his opinion, wasn't as talented in duelling as he was. His eyes continued to glance furtively at Tonks, who was duelling Bellatrix. The psychopath hadn't shot a killing curse yet, which was a bonus. Then, despite his fight, he was glanced fervently at Sirius, who appeared to be assisting Harry in duels. They were dangerously close to an arch, not that the arch looked pernicious, but you never knew. This was a hall known for its mysteries after all.

He continued to fire curses at the older Malfoy, who seemed to be putting his heart into the duel. Remus refrained from laughing, knowing that it would make Malfoy up his fighting a notch. He wasn't afraid; Malfoy was incapable of killing, as far as Remus was logically concerned. It would get them into problems in the Ministry. But he was a known Death Eater now, there was proof, which felt quite vindicating.

He glanced again at Tonks, who seemed to have moved on from Bellatrix, unscathed. He took a sigh of relief. He turned back to Malfoy, sending a final curse, blasting him into a wall.

That was when he felt something strange. His heart was pounding abnormally hard. His first thought was whether Tonks was okay or not, and she was. He glanced up and saw Bellatrix pointing her wand at his best friend, his big brother, who hadn't noticed.

Remus wanted to warn Sirius, he had to, but it all happened so quickly. One second Sirius was laughing, and the next second, he was falling through the archway, into some sort of veil that was revealed. But it was okay. He would come out the other end.

He never did.

**A/N: Sirius is...dead... :'( I kept trying to delay this chapter, I didn't want to write it. It makes it seem real. Is it weird that there are tears on my face while I was writing this? Review, please.**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: This was a really hard chapter to write, which is why it took so long. I hope I did it justice. I'm not sure how proud I am of this chapter...**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, or any of the depressed characters who appear in this chapter. Oh and some of the quotes come from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.**

No. No. It didn't just happen. It was fake. Remus wanted to scream, he wanted to call him back, he wanted to run through the veil and get him back. He wanted to pull him through and apologize.

But when he thought of Sirius, he was left with a duty, a duty for Sirius' godson.

"SIRIUS! SIRIUS!"

It was a good thing he remembered his duty before his emotions too, because Harry Potter was running straight for the veil. He grabbed Harry by the arms; he could feel Tonks' eyes on him, but he tried hard to ignore it.

"There's nothing you can do, Harry-"

"Get him, save him! He's only just gone through!"

Remus squeezed his eyes shut, Sirius had gone through a veil that seemed to have no way to appear out the other end.

"-It's too late, Harry."

"We can still reach him -"

Harry started to try and pull away from Remus, but he couldn't let him go. He held him as tight as he could.

"There's nothing you can do, Harry...nothing..." Remus bit back tears. Saying it would make it reality, but it _was_ real. He had to believe it, and so the young teenager in his arms. "...he's gone..."

"He hasn't gone!" Harry continued to yell, trying to pry Remus' arms from him. "SIRIUS! SIRIUS!"

Remus continued to hold on, Sirius wasn't going to come back. If the way Harry was yelling and struggling didn't call him back, than nothing would. It was true. He could feel his eyes burning as the truth started to settle. He could barely believe it. The only reason he had to rush through his process of mourning was the most important boy in the Wizarding World. Whose life rested literally in his arms, his arms that couldn't support anyone, not the girl he loved, the one Sirius wanted for him. But what did Sirius matter? His best friend, his _big brother, _was...was...gone. And he had to tell Harry.

He could feel his voice breaking as he started to speak and held Harry back with all his might. "He can't come back, Harry. He can't come back, because he's d-"

"HE-IS-NOT-DEAD!" Harry roared, finally breaking free from Remus' exhausted hands. He could hear Harry continue to yell as he ran. "SIRIUS!"

Remus flopped down onto the floor. He knew he shouldn't. He knew he was at a vulnerable position. But it didn't matter. He was a failure. He couldn't hold back Harry, he couldn't keep Sirius happy when he was alive, he couldn't hold Sirius back from...falling through the veil. The only person he wanted was his Nymphadora, but he couldn't, he mustn't! Everyone who got close to him ended up dead, and he was a failure at doing his job at protection. He could see the jets of light flying around, but suddenly stop. He could hear the cracks of the Death Eaters leaving, and finally let some of the tears fall.

He felt a warm hand on his shoulder, one that gave him trembles of delight, and as much as he tried to ignore his impulse, he let the hand guide him to safety. He could feel the work of side-along apparition, and then the view of...his...house. Remus sank down on the couch, where he used to sit with Sirius so much, and buried his face in his hands.

Tonks stared at Remus, in horror of the situation that had just happened. It had been so fast! One minute Sirius was there, defending her against Remus, and the next second she was sitting with a vulnerable Remus, who had just lost his best friend. She knew it was selfish to be thinking about this in standards pertaining to herself, but how was she to ignore her thoughts? Sirius would no longer be there for her, he'd no longer help her get to Remus.

Remus started to hold back on his thoughts relating to Sirius, trying to get over the death quickly for his best mate. That was what he was expected to do, as a Marauder. As the last Marauder for real this time. He would not let his emotions start to drive him. He would hide them deep within, not let anyone know of the pain he was in, not let his emotions make him forget of his duty.

"Remus, I'm here...we can do this, _together_," Tonks said soothingly.

Remus pushed away from Tonks immediately, or as far as one could get sitting on the same loveseat. Those were exactly the words Sirius had once told him. It hurt to think of Sirius, but he tried to forget about the pain.

"No, no, we can't."

"Remus," Tonks tried again. "We'll both miss him, he'd want us to move on..."

"And that's what I'm doing," Remus snarled. "Leave me alone, Tonks. I don't want to have to deal with yet another burden upon my life."

Tonks didn't show the hurt in her eyes. "Look, I'm sorry if this is too early, but I think we need each other."

"I don't need you! I need you to leave! Go far away! Or I'll do it. There's no too early, it's never. I'm never ready to deal with an extra problem!"

Tonks tried to remind herself that Remus was going through a lot right now, and probably didn't mean the words he was saying. At least, she hoped not. She would never quite know, Sirius would not be here to tell her what was going through Remus' mind right now.

"That's all? Just a problem?" Tonks asked lightly, seeming to take the role Remus normally played through a normal conversation.

"Just a damn problem is what you are! Had you not been there, had I not cared about you, I could be fighting by Sirius' side, defending him, the way we normally duelled! I could have _saved_ him. I could have taken the curse for him! He died thinking I hated him. Because of _you_. Because he supported you more than he did I," Remus' voice had started to break again, and his eyes were desperately trying to hold in tears. Suddenly, his face became stoic and his eyes flashed.

Tonks could feel the tears streaming down her own face. "I was duelling Bellatrix. I should have saved him. I'm so sorry, Remus."

"There's no _sorry_," Remus said, almost mockingly. "Sorry won't bring him back. Sorry doesn't cut it. You have to grow up already."

"Help me grow up then," Tonks said pleadingly, closing the gap between her and Remus. "Show me what it's like."

Remus shut his eyes tight, trying to ignore the fact Tonks was sitting in such close proximity of him, and slowly moving closer.

"I _won't_," he said, standing up from the couch. "I can't. I'm too old for someone as young as you. You deserve someone young, which I cannot provide. You deserve money, which I cannot provide. I'm useless. There's no one for me to keep trying for, no reason for me to live..."_  
_

"There's me!" Tonks pointed out. "There's _me_."

"I don't _want_ to live for you!" Remus hissed. "Just - just - I'm leaving! Forget about me!"

"Please, no, Remus!" Tonks had started to bawl now. "Don't! I need you!"

Remus ignored Tonks' protests and disapparated with a crack, leaving Tonks to her distraught thoughts. There was no Sirius for her to talk to, there was no Remus. She would not give up, _Sirius_ would not want her to give up. She would not stop fighting until she got Remus, they would be together hand in hand for the rest of eternity...as soon as he pulled out whatever was stuck in his arse.

* * *

Remus entered his house, keeping everything he was feeling bottled in. He wouldn't let it out. He was going to forget about Tonks. She was becoming too much for him to handle, he had duty to uphold. He would not lead Tonks on. Tonks would one day understand that what he was doing was the best for the both of them.

He knew that was a lie. The two truly needed each other. But he had to protect her. He could not let her die because of him. She was young, she was wealthy, she needed someone good enough for her, who could protect her, not be the cause of her problems. Remus could not fulfill that promise. He would become more of a burden to her than a protectorate.

But Remus would have to live for her. She was something worth living for, just to know she was alive would be good enough. Who knew what was experienced after death? He had to stay alive to make sure that Nymphadora was safe, even if he watched from a safe distance.

Remus was about to lay down on his bed and reminisce about the good times he had with his big brother, to remember what they lived for, when he heard a soft _hoot _from the window.

Unable to muster the energy to curse the owl, Remus stood up and walked over to the window.

_Hey, Remus, mate, Moony!_

_Guess who? *psst* It's actually not that hard to guess, it's only your best friend *end psst*. Ahem. That wasn't me! It's not Sirius Padfoot Black! Okay, fine, I know you're rolling your eyes at me - or are you? - or by now at least! I've attached something for you, something I just KNOW you'll be needing now that you and Tonks are together. Oh yeah! I predicted correct, I know! You should give me fifty galleons (you know, the money I lost with the bet with Prongs...I'm still trying to earn that back) because I knew exactly when the two of you would get together. Oh, don't lie, Moony, I know you are! And, I know that you are probably now preparing to write a short message back saying there was no bet and to not disturb you and blah blah blah because you want to get back to making out with Tonks...ew...bad mental images. Oh well! I hope now that the two of you are together, you will see that I have been right all along, because you are the perfect couple! I know now you're like, how did the genius Sirius Black figure this out? Well, it's quite simple, really. I'm a bloody GENIUS! Okay, I know you're rolling your eyes now...actually you've probably been doing this throughout this entire letter, seeing as you seem to do that a lot when I'm around. Wait, you and Tonks ARE together, right? Oh what am I doing, doubting myself, damn. I'm becoming you, Moony! You should be so proud. I'm actually doing well! I'm growing up! Is Tonks trying to read over your shoulder? Oh, I know she is. How, may you ask? Because I am psychic (see, I learned a Muggle phrase! That's ten more galleons!). HEY TONKS! Okay, now, stop reading, because this is private information. Great, you're not leaving. Well, I'm about to talk about manly things, and I mean it, Moony would kindly tell you that you don't want to know the dirty, manly stuff that goes on in my mind. Okay, you done, Moony? Good job. I'm not ACTUALLY going to talk to you about that, well kinda, no, don't put the parchment down! I spent a long time using all the skills I learned at Hogwarts to write this! Remember? You told me to use more voice so that it's an interesting read? Or was it Prongs? I don't know...Anyway, I hope you use what I've attached right now, actually DON'T. I want to see what it looks like with you, so do it at my house seeing as I'm locked in. I wanna get out so bad, but that's a different story. You know, Moony, this is just like talking to you! My hand hurts... :( - look, another Muggle thing! You should be proud, because I know you love me! Anyway, go back to making out with Tonks, don't let me disturb you._

_PADFOOT! _

_ AKA The best person to ever walk this planet_

**A/N: Hope you liked it. I hope you can see some parts that are parallel with HBP now...I had to add that letter in from Sirius, I miss him _so _much. And we needed humour, this was too angsty. So yay for the chapter which features Arse!Remus, Depressed!Tonks, and Oblivious!Sirius. Oh, he wrote the letter when Remus first came to talk to him, most may have brushed over the fact...it happened at the end of chapter 4. Reviews are nice...!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Here's the next chapter! Sorry that this update took longer than usual, I've had no idea how to convey what Tonks and Remus are feeling. The next chapter will be the last one, and I might add an epilogue depending on how many people want it. **

**This chappie consists of a few memories of Tonks before it gets into the real thing. And then I added the next chapter to this one that does the same thing as Remus, because I felt like it. Enjoy the the chapter.**

**Disclaimer: By now, I hope you realize I don't own Harry Potter. Don't sue me ;) And I used some quotes from Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.**

_Remus had shown up to the Order meeting, but didn't talk to anyone. Tonks had been so relieved to see Remus; she had been blocked out of his house. _

_"Professor Dumbledore," he had said. "I think Voldemort is recruiting werewolves and other Dark Creatures again. I personally think we need a spy, as you have requested earlier, and here I am, ready made for the task."_

_Tonks had jumped out of her seat to contradict, but once Remus made a decision and Dumbledore agreed, there was no contradicting._

_"Please, Remus, it's too dangerous, you could DIE!" Tonks had exclaimed, holding onto Remus' arm._

_Remus had tried to ignore Tonks, but it was of no use._

_"Let go of my arm, Tonks. It doesn't matter if I die. I have no obligations towards you, stop worrying unnecessarily."_

_"REMUS!" Tonks had continued to pull on Remus' arm._

_Remus, ignoring all the members of the Order's stares, pushed Tonks to the ground and apparated away, presumably to his house where he could accept Voldemort's request._

* * *

_Tonks' hair wasn't changing colour. It was one of the scariest things that had happened. She couldn't metamorph. The last time this had happened was when she was younger, and couldn't control her abilities. She had looked in the mirror, and saw her hair was now a sandy colour. Remus. It was because her heart wanted him more than ever. It was unfortunate that he wouldn't give her the time of day. _

* * *

_Tonks had been practicing her Patronus; she had never had such trouble with it before. The only happy memories she could think of were ones involving Remus, and those were definitely not working out. Finally, she got a silvery wisp out of her wand. She had been thinking about when Sirius said that Remus loved her. She delved deeper into that memory, visualizing her and Remus together as a happy couple. Finally, she had produced the corpeal Patronus she had been waiting for. But it had changed form. It was now a wolf. Remus. _

* * *

_"No, no, I need to get going," said Tonks, not meeting Dumbledore's eyes. __"Night..."_

_"Dear, why not come to dinner at the weekend, Remus and Mad-Eye are __coming...?" _

_It had almost seemed that everyone thought she and Remus were attached by the hip. If only that were true...if only he would love her. She was mad for him..._

_"No, really, Molly... thanks anyway... Good night, everyone."_

_Tonks had escaped from the burrow as quickly as she could. She didn't want to see Remus. It would make him unhappy, and he would run off again. If Remus were coming to the burrow, it was best she left him alone to relax. She couldn't relax with him._

* * *

_"I think you were better off with the old one," said Snape, the malice in his voice unmistakable. "The new one looks weak."_

_Tonks had wanted to punch Snape in the face. Of course her Patronus was weak! It was based on a memory she knew could never happen. Remus would never love her. They weren't meant to be. _

_Harry was standing right there and looking at her curiously, though, so she didn't retort. Not that there was anything that she could have said..._

* * *

It had been seven months since Tonks had last seen Remus. She knew she was getting skinnier, weaker...but there was nothing she could do about it. Life just didn't seem the same. There seemed to be something missing from Tonks' life, the light that used to shine in her eyes was gone. She knew she was no longer fun to be around; she could see Harry's rush to try and get away from her as soon as possible. But what else did anyone expect?

She wandered the halls of Hogwarts, trying to see if she could get a meeting with Dumbledore. Maybe, just maybe, she could get Dumbledore to get Remus out of the mess she had stuffed him in?

She stood in front of the gargoyle, many memories of her school days brought back to surface. The times she had been carefree, completely oblivious to the real world around her. Completely oblivious to the fact that boys existed in the time of war, completely oblivious to the affect that they could have on her heart.

After guessing all the candies she could think of, the gargoyle finally opened for "Peppermint Humbugs".

Unfortunately, when she went into the office, she found McGonagall in there.

"Oh, Professor!" Tonks said in surprise.

McGonagall cocked her head, keeping her stern face on. "Miss Tonks, I have requested time and time again that you call me 'Minerva'. We are colleagues you know...Remus makes the same mistake as well...it must be a student thing."

It took all of Tonks' will to not let her eyes water. She already made the mistake in front of Harry, she wasn't going to do it in front of her former transfiguration professor as well. She couldn't even get mad at McGonagall for the lack of tact, she hadn't been present at a lot of the Order meetings.

"Sorry, er, _Minerva_," Tonks said. "But do you know where Professor Dumbledore is?"

Tonks could feel McGonagall's eyes inspecting her. It felt quite odd.

"I'm afraid the Headmaster is not here. He is away on business. You've come by a few times. Can I help you with anything?"

Tonks literally burst into tears and fell to the floor next to the guest chair.

"R-Re-Remus..." she blubbered.

She could tell McGonagall looked very uncomfortable as she patted Tonks on the back awkwardly.

"There, there, I'm sure he's alright. He's a very brave and skilled wizard," McGonagall comforted. "We all miss him."

"No, you don't understand! It's worse!" Tonks tried to stand up, but tripped over the guest chair, so settled for bawling on the floor.

"What's worse, Miss Tonks?" McGonagall asked. She looked very confused indeed.

"It's just, oh, Minerva...I love him!"

"You - you, love him?" McGonagall looked uncannily delighted. "I'd love to see some more love around here! You two would be perfect! Oh, I understand your worry and-"

"But he's b-been avoiding me!" Tonks continued to wail.

"...Oh," said McGonagall lamely. "That is a problem."

"S-S-Sirius said he loved me back, _he_ had said so, apparently, but he's too bloody stubborn to say so!" Tonks sniffed, wiping her tears. She was rather ashamed that she had started to cry.

McGonagall actually let out a small laugh. "That sounds like Remus."

"I just wish I could see Dumbledore, get him to get Remus back..."

"My apologies, Miss Tonks, but I assure you that the headmaster has no control over what Remus does. I'll talk to him though."

Tonks gave a sad but grateful smile. "Thanks."

She tripped on her way out the door, but caught herself and continued to walk. She walked down the halls slowly, on her way back to her post.

"OW!"

It had sounded strongly like Harry, and chances of being under his invisibility cloak were very high.

"Harry?" she took the risk.

Harry was on the ground by the time the invisibility cloak fell off of him. "What're you doing here?"

Had Tonks been feeling more springy at the moment, had Remus actually come back, she would have found the fact she found Harry lying on the floor rather amusing. But this was not the case. She didn't want to smile unless she had Remus standing by her side.

"I came to see Dumbledore."

Harry started to speak, probably under the impression he was being helpful. "His office isn't here, it's round the other side of the castle, behind the gargoyle -"

Tonks refrained from rolling her eyes. Common to _some people's _beliefs, she was not daft.

"I know, he's not there. Apparently he's gone away again."

Harry then proceeded to ask where Dumbledore went, much to the annoyance of Tonks. If she knew, wouldn't she go and get him to go bring Remus back?

"No," Tonks replied. She got ready to walk away again, when Harry asked:

"What did you need to see him about?"

That was not Harry's business, it's not like he would be able to bring Remus back.

"Nothing in particular," said Tonks, fidgeting with her sleeve. It was a common habit whenever she lied. She hoped Harry hadn't picked up on it. "I just thought he might know what's going on. I've heard rumors… people getting hurt."

Harry didn't appear to question the blatant lie, but started to talk about that. One would think that he couldn't understand social cues. She wanted to be left alone, with Remus, and instead she had to deal with Harry. Perhaps, though, if he had been talking the whole time, he might've had some news from Remus.

"The Prophet's often behind the times," said Tonks casually. "You haven't had any letters from anyone in the Order recently?"

Tonks assumed she had interrupted Harry on some important tangent based on his annoyed look.

"No one in the Order writes to me anymore," said Harry.

This didn't make Tonks feel too good. Remus hadn't contacted anyone...she could only continue to hope he was okay.

"What?" Tonks asked, realizing Harry was still talking. "Well. I'll see you around, Harry."

She turned around awkwardly, going back to her station, where she would be performing the boringest job in history...defending the school that was quite clearly not in danger.

...oOo...

_Remus had huddled in the midst of the cave, trying to stay warm. He was scared to get too close to the werewolves, he didn't want to actually attack anything during the time of the full moon. He had known that getting too close to the other werewolves would result in his wolf side joining them, and later wishing for that every full moon. He had tried hard not to think of Tonks, he knew he shouldn't. That would only make the wolf unhappy, and he knew that wouldn't help matters too much. It was already going to be a bad full moon without Sirius.  
_

_Damn women for sticking in his head so much! Damn Sirius for dying and making his life difficult! Damn the stupid war!_

* * *

_"I've been living among my fellows, my equals," Remus had said to Harry. "Werewolves. Nearly all of them are on Voldemort's side. Dumbledore wanted a spy and here I was . . . ready-made." He knew he sounded bitter, and he knew he shouldn't. It was his decision. He couldn't love Tonks, and the easiest way to avoid her getting hurt was to stay away. He had forced a small, warm smile, "I am not complaining; it is necessary work and who can do it better than I? However, it has been difficult gaining their trust. I bear the unmistakable signs of having tried to live among wizards, you see, whereas they have shunned normal society and live on the margins, stealing — and sometimes killing — to eat."_

_It had been at this moment that Remus had made the decision to not let his problems get in the way of how he was acting. It was add unnecessary problems in an all ready difficult time. _

* * *

_"But she wouldn't come," Molly had been saying. "Have you spoken to her lately, Remus?"_

_Remus had been pretty frustrated at this moment in time. He had been doing such a good job pushing Tonks out of his life, but everyone was determined to bring her up again. It wasn't like they were attached by the hip, now were they?_

_"No, I haven't been in contact with anybody very much," said Remus. "But Tonks has got her own family to go to, hasn't she?" _

_"Hmmm," Molly said. "Maybe. I got the impression she was __planning to spend Christmas alone, actually."_

_Damn them all for trying to guilt trip him. Then, as if that wasn't enough, Molly sent an annoyed look towards him, as if HE'D been the reason Tonks didn't want to come to the burrow. Well, maybe it was his fault, but it didn't mean she had to point it out! _

_As if Molly pining that guilt on him wasn't enough, Harry had decided to speak up._

_"Tonks' Patronus has changed form. Snape said so anyway. I didn't know that could happen. Why would your Patronus change?"_

_Remus didn't need all the extra guilt. It was his fault Tonks was depressed; Sirius had reminded him of that quite enough. He had taken his time chewing his food, thinking about how to answer Harry's question._

_"Sometimes...a great shock...an emotional up-heaval..."_

_Harry seemed to have a lightbulb go off in his head. _

_"It looked big, and it had four legs...hey...it couldn't be -"_

_By now, Remus had been certain Tonks' Patronus had changed to a Wolf. 'Cue more guilt,' he had thought bitterly._

* * *

Remus visited his flat for the first time in forever, unsure of what to make of the situation. He felt like his heart was tearing into pieces; he had never felt so guilty. He debated in his mind visiting his father, but he knew that that would only lead to further guilt. He called this upon himself. He knew that if he went out with Tonks, it would lead to more guilt, and if he continued to ignore her, the guilt would still continue to pile up. It was a lose-lose situation, but in one he would put Tonks in danger. He wished there was an easy way out of this mess. He wished that he never fell in love with Tonks in the first place, but as Sirius had told James years ago, you couldn't force your heart one way or another. He would have to bear through it, hoping that the guilt would eventually fade.

**A/N: Did you like it? You should review! Thank you to all my reviewers for the previous chapter :)**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Here it is! The last chapter! The end of Realization!**

**This has been one of my favourite chapters to write; I hope it's good and you enjoy! It's a little long, and much of it is from HBP, but hey. This is important.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the story or the quotes that appear in HBP.**

Remus had been called back by Dumbledore to come and defend Hogwarts while he and Harry went on an important mission. Remus never questioned what the mission was, despite is curiousness. He knew it wasn't his matters to delve into. But when he found his station, he found that it was annoyingly next to Tonks. He swore Dumbledore did it on purpose. He hated him for that.

"Hey," Tonks said softly, almost carefully, as she scooted a little close to Remus.

Remus didn't give even the smallest of nods to show that he had heard Tonks speak.

"Kind of creepy night, don't you think?" Tonks tried again.

Remus couldn't ignore Tonks anymore. As long as they just acted professionally, nothing should get out of hand.

"I think so. A little odd that Dumbledore left on such a night."

Tonks was overjoyed that Remus had finally spoken to her, although there was no missing the forced polite tone he was speaking to her. Some words were better than no words though, right?

"As you normally say, Dumbledore will have his reasons."

"So there normally is. I've never seen him make a mistake yet, nor do I expect him to."

Tonks hesitated. "I never imagined a war would be so scary, I'm always worried about losing my loved ones."

"That's a normal feeling," Remus replied automatically. "Our families are constantly in danger..."

"And friends," added Tonks.

Remus opened and shut his mouth a few times. He was about to answer when three students started racing towards them.

"Wha - What happened?" asked Remus urgently. Tonks had run up to the spot, looking equally concerned.

The three students happened to be Ron, Ginny, and Neville, and they were all quite out of breath. The three looked rather serious as well, and it hit Remus that something just was not right.

"Quick," Remus prompted.

Ginny took a breath.

"Harry told us to guard the Room of Requirement, and we were doing so, when Malfoy opened the door, and he was who...who we were waiting for. He was holding this shriveled hand and suddenly the halls went dark. No spell could penetrate it, so we think he's somewhere in the school, and has done something illegal!"

Remus' eyes widened and he was off in the blink of an eye, Tonks getting ready to follow.

"Be careful, there could be -"

"DEATH EATERS!" she heard Remus' voice echo around.

"Oh bloody hell," Tonks heard Ron mutter as she followed.

Remus was firing all the spells he could think of, watching the crowd of Death Eaters start to disperse.

"STUPEFY!"

Remus turned around to see Tonks, and many other teachers had joined the fight, along with a few Order members. He thought he saw Bill Weasley join as well. A Death Eater separated from the crowd and started to head towards the Astonomy tower.

"GIBBON!" Tonks yelled. "Get back here, you _coward_!"_  
_

Gibbon merely ran off, after sending a smirk in Tonk' direction.

The two continued to fight. Remus occasionally ducked under a killing curse.

"AVADA KEDAVRA!"

Remus stared as the flash from the wand rushed towards Tonks.

"Nymphadora!" yelled Remus, and Tonks ducked.

Tonks didn't have much time for many 'thank you's though, there was still a battle and the two had to hold their own ground.

However, Remus saw, out of the corner of his eye, Gibbon return down the staircase from the Astronomy tower. He didn't have long to brood on this matter, for he watched a killing curse fired in his direction. He stepped to his left, and watched as the killing curse struck Gibbon, who fell to the ground, dead.

Tonks grimaced at the sight as the two continued to duel.

Suddenly, Remus froze, staring straight at Bill. Tonks took it upon herself to fight on Remus' behalf, trying to defend him while he was in temporary shock.

"GREYBACK!" shouted Remus, rushing towards a young boy, around Tonks' age.

Greyback merely looked at Remus, gave a small sneer, and continued to attack the red haired boy.

"It's Bill!" Tonks announced, firing a few more curses at the dispersing Death Eaters.

Remus shot a stunning spell at Greyback, who took it as his cue to leave, and instead travelled up to the Astronomy tower.

Remus then saw Draco Malfoy step over Bill and rush up too, followed by Snape. Remus breathed a sigh of relief, if Snape was going up, then he'd fight off the Death Eaters.

Remus ran up to Bill's body, while Tonks cast a shield charm around them.

"He's been injured," Remus whispered, looking a mixture of both shocked and disgusted. "These are cursed, he has to get them treated _now_."

"What?" asked Tonks.

"You heard me," Remus said, his heart beating quickly with adrenaline. "Come with me and cast a shield charm, and let's hurry to the Hospital Wing. We don't need an extra causality. The staff can hold their own."

Tonks was about to follow when she paused. "My Merlin, NEVILLE!"

Remus lay Bill down and rushed to the Longbottom child.

"Ib fine," Neville muttered, coughing a bit. "Lemme ub..."

"One second, Neville," Remus said, pointing his wand at the injured student.

"DUCK!" Tonks suddenly yelled, pouncing upon the two boys next to her. "Blimey, you _cowards_!" She proceeded to lure the Death Eaters away from Neville, Bill, and Remus.

"Finite Incantatem," Remus said.

"Thank you," Neville said. "Would've done myself, but my hands..."

"It's okay, you have to get to the Hospital Wing," Remus said. "Along with Bi - PROTEGO!"

He blocked the hex that was coming his way, send by Antonin Dolohov.

Remus stood up and started firing every hex he could think of at the Death Eater, who was laughing as he blocked them, sending the killing curse every few times.

In the midst of all this, Tonks caught sight of the brown haired Carrow twins rushing up to the Astronomy Tower. What was going on up there? She caught eyes with Remus, who was just as confused and concerned.

A few Death Eaters followed, running up a flight of stairs. Before anyone could stop him, Neville stood up and started racing towards the staircase, Remus and Tonks protesting feebly. Neville hit some sort of barrier and flew back, as if he had just been in an explosion.

"Neville!" Tonks shrieked, as she went to go help him.

"I'm fine," he muttered. "Just a little shocked. Stairs got a barrier."

"So we've noticed," Tonks mumbled, and Remus couldn't help but smile.

Remus, after sending a couple of hexes towards the opposition, carefully walked over to the invisible barrier.

"REDUCTO!"

Snape ran towards the staircase.

"Can't do much, Severus. The stairs are blocked. REDUCTO!"

Snape continued towards the hexed staircase, and despite Remus' warning, Snape went through the barrier.

"Holy Merlin," said Tonks in awe, but she didn't have much time for anything else, for she was forced to cast a couple more defensive jinxes.

Remus, on the other hand, was pretty worried about Snape, and ran towards the barrier. Unfortunately, he was thrown back. Tonks cast a cushioning and shield charm around Remus, who sent back a grateful grin.

"As long as Snape is there, the Death Eaters are taken care of," said Tonks. "We have _got _to get Neville and Bill to the Hospital Wing."

Unfortunately, before they could get much of this taken care of, a rather burly Death Eater seemed to have lost aim, resulting in his curse being fired towards the ceiling.

Tonks screamed and cast a protective charm over her and the other students within her proximity, while Remus took care of himself and Bill.

"The barrier must be broken," Remus declared, and everyone who was able to move rushed towards the staircase.

Remus had entered through the entrance hexing as many Death Eaters as he could.

"Remus!" Tonks called, but suddenly caught sight of Snape pulling on Malfoy. She moved off to the side courteously before resuming firing the curses.

Snape had shouted something incoherent, that was missed by the Order members as they were busy attacking the opposing side.

"They're all leaving!" Remus exclaimed as the last of the Death Eaters escaped their clutches.

"Where to?" asked Tonks, looking greatly concerned.

"I have no idea, but let's get Bill and Neville out of here, _now_."

"I can walk," Neville announced, trembling as he stood up.

"Dora, go support Neville, I'll take Bill," Remus ordered, in all the chaos forgetting to call Tonks 'Tonks'.

Tonks noticed the change and blushed slightly, before giving a small nod.

The two rushed to the Hospital Wing as quickly as they could whilst carrying two rather heavy men. They noticed a few more of the students who were fighting follow, perhaps because they figured it was a lost battle. Ginny looked quite shaken up, her eyes were wide and she was breathing heavily. She seemed to be rather thankful, but no one questioned her.

"It'll all be okay," Tonks continued to mutter. "It'll all be okay."

"Oh my Merlin! Lay him down, lay him down!" were the first words that Remus heard upon entering the Hospital Wing.

"He was bitten by Greyback, although he was in human form," Remus announced, while Tonks helped Neville onto a bed.

"Oh my," Pomfrey said softly. "I can try my best...he won't look the same anymore, not after being bitten by a werewolf. He's lucky Greyback was in human form at the time."

The room fell silent, except for the faint occasional cooing of Madam Pomfrey.

"Thank you," said Tonks softly, it was almost missed. "I would have been dead if it wasn't for your help."

Remus hesitated. "You're welcome. It's always helpful, having an ally when your duelling."

Tonks couldn't help but feel the rush of guilt from Sirius' death return. But she knew she had to stay strong. She had to persevere Remus. She would not give up.

McGonagall entered the Hospital Wing before Tonks could say much more to Remus.

"Sweet Merlin," she exclaimed, looking highly relieved to see her students. "Okay, I want to gather all the students here, now."

"I'll help," Ginny said determinedly, getting up. "We have to get Harry, and Hermione. Ron, you stay with Bill."

Tonks and Remus gave Ginny an approving nod, both mildly impressed by her ability to take charge in a situation.

"Filius is injured," said McGonagall, but I believe I some others are taking care of him...I know Horace is, anyway."

All the occupants acknowledged this fact. McGonagall and Ginny left the room, which then fell into another uncomfortable silence.

"I could have lost you tonight, Dora," Remus whispered, not thinking.

Ron, for once, had a bit of tact and did not make any immature comments on what Remus had said.

Tonks gave a light smile, feeling her stomach fluttering with butterflies. "And I, you. It's the times, Remus. With the war, we have to live every day like it's our last, with no regrets."

Remus ran his hand over his pocket, shutting his eyes.

"I've been a real arse, haven't I? I'm sorry. We can still be friends."

"I suppose. Colleagues, at least, in any way," said Tonks, hoping Remus was contradict.

Unfortunately, there was no time for Remus to respond even with just the nod of his head.

The door of the Hospital Wing creaked open, and Tonks and Remus rushed forward, holding their wands at the ready. Ron stood protectively in front of Bill.

"It's just us," Ginny said, her eyes dead. "Ginny, Hermione, and Harry..."

"Are you all right, Harry?" Remus asked, looking quite worried. He didn't like the dead, solemn look upon the faces of the people who had entered.

"I'm fine," replied Harry, trying to look behind Ron. "How's Bill?"

Remus and Tonks exchanged glances, and moved to the side. Ron moved over closer to Hermione. Harry's face had contorted to one of extreme worry as he seemed to be watching the nurse apply an ointment.

Tonks sat next to Remus on the foot of the bed as they watched Harry inquire whether or not Bill would be okay.

Remus continued to look down at his shoes, not wanting to catch eyes with Tonks. It did something to his heart, and he didn't want to make a foolhardy decision under the influence of his emotions. He jerked his head up when he felt Harry's eyes on him.

"No, I don't think Bill will be a true werewolf," said Remus, once again placing his duty over his own life. "But that doesn't mean that there won't be some contamination. Those are cursed wounds, and are unlikely to ever fully heal, and - and Bill might have some wolfish characteristics from now on."

Ron, however, looked up quite hopefully.

"Dumbledore might have something that'd work, though. Where is he? Bill fought those maniacs on Dumbledore's orders, Dumbledore owes him, he can't leave him in this state-"

Remus and Tonks exchanged grins. How had they not thought of Dumbledore? Although Remus had a small ounce of doubt, Dumbledore would at least have the power to improve the situation for Bill. But Ginny had said something that had destroyed any last bit of hope that they had for Bill.

"Ron - Dumbledore's dead."

Tonks was taken aback. Dumbledore couldn't be dead, it wasn't possible. She looked to Remus for some reassurance, but he seemed to be in worse condition.

Remus couldn't believe it and stood up.

"No!" he yelled, looking to Harry for support. Dumbledore couldn't be head. He was his mentor, the only man who had given him his first chance at life. The reason he had a childhood, the reason he had had friends in the first place. He was the reason Remus was fighting in this war using magic, and not on the side of Voldemort. Dumbledore could not be snatched away from him so cruelly.

Much to Remus' disappointment, Harry did not say anything. The feelings were too much, he couldn't hold his emotions in anymore. He flopped down in the chair next to Bill's bed and covered his face in his hands.

Tonks pitied Remus more than ever. She bit her lip as she stared at Remus, before turning to Harry.

"How did he die?" she whispered, her voice trembling. "How did this happen?"

Harry went on to tell the story of what had happened up in the Astronomy Tower. The room had fallen silent, and Remus uncovered his face, taking deep breaths.

He glanced at Tonks, who had a wry smile plastered on her face.

"Molly and Arthur are coming," McGonagall announced as she walked in the room. She then asked Harry what had happened to Dumbledore, and he repeated the facts.

Much to Remus and Tonks' dismay, Harry's story showed no change or any hint he was lying. It was true. The greatest wizard of all time had been defeated by his own kindness. It gave Remus a reason to hate Snape, and he continued to accuse him. James had seen this right in the beginning, he _knew _not to trust Snape. If only Dumbledore had listened to his former student's intuition, _if only _Remus had payed attention to his friend's admonition.

The group continued to mope, blaming themselves and Snape for all that had happened that night. Ginny and Ron gave a summary of what they had done, Remus and Tonks interjecting when they needed to. Hermione explained what her and Luna had been up to when they were guarding.

Tonks wanted to punch Snape more than ever. Snape had hurt her with his painful words before, but now he had done the unforgivable. He had killed - _killed _- Dumbledore, and he had hurt someone who had been nothing but kind to him. Snape deserved to die, in her humble opinion.

"He shouted 'It's over'," said Harry, finishing the story. "He had done what he'd meant to do."

Snape had bloody planned this from the very beginning! Remus could not believe it. He started to wish that he had bitten Snape the day Sirius had forced him down the Whomping Willow. Then none of this would have happened. It was all Remus' fault.

Tonks sent a comforting glance in Remus' direction, but he paid her no attention. It seemed as if she was going back to square one now that another death had come and affected Remus in such a way. It made her frustrated. They were living in a war, this was to be expected!"

Suddenly, the doors of the Hospital Wing burst open, Molly and Arthur running in, and a terrified Fleur Delacour behind them.

"Molly - Arthur - I am so sorry!" McGonagall exclaimed, jumping up to greet the family.

Tonks and Remus jumped up and moved over to the corner, as to not get in the way.

"Bill," Molly whispered, shoving past McGonagall. "Oh, _Bill_!"

Remus couldn't help but feel terrible for Molly. He knew how hard it must have been on his parents when he had been bitten. He reassured the Weasleys all he could. After all, Bill had been bitten by a werewolf in human form, the outcome would have been quite different - and much more tragic - had Bill been bitten on the full moon.

Tonks grimaced as Molly brought up the past tense of marriage. She knew Fleur well enough from Ginny to know that her temper was quite a bit off. But she was curious to see what would happen.

Remus remained stoic, not sure if he liked where this was going.

"And what do you mean by zat? What do you mean, ' 'e was _going_ to be married'?"

"Well - only that -"

Remus didn't blame Molly for thinking like that. Most people would call off the marriage with a half human once they gained their senses. Although, Bill definitely was still going to be human, his job wouldn't be affected, at least.

"You theenk Bill will not wish to marry me anymore?" demanded Fleur hotly. "You theenk, because of those bites, he will not love me?"

Molly was looking highly uncomfortable. Had the situation not been so tense, Tonks was sure she would have burst out into laughter.

"No, that's not what I-"

"Because 'e will! It would take more zan a werewolf to stop Bill from loving me!"

"Well, yes, I'm sure," Molly said, exchanging a hopeless glance at Remus, who gave an amused smile. "But I thought perhaps - given how - how he-"

"You thought _I_ would not weesh to marry him? Or per'aps, you hoped?" Tonks could see Ginny looking down guiltily. "What do I care how he looks? I am good-looking enough for the both of us, I theenk! All these scars show zat my husband is brave!" she suddenly grabbed the ointment from Molly. "And I shall do zat!"

Tonks started to stare at the scene, filled with a burning jealousy. Fleur was going to get the boy of her dreams, at this rate, despite what the family thought of her. She narrowed her eyes when Molly suggested the goblin-made tiara. When she couldn't take it anymore, she turned to Remus, who was red in the face. He seemed to know what was coming, and tried to look anywhere but at her. Tonks could feel herself being filled with courage like she never felt before.

"You see!" Tonks exclaimed, pointing at Fleur whilst glaring at Remus as if all this was his fault. "She still wants to marry him, even though he's been bitten! She doesn't care!"

Remus could feel all the eyes on him. He wanted to slap Tonks for declaring her seriousness for love from Remus in such a public way, but he couldn't bring himself to.

"It's different," Remus muttered, keeping his body tense and choosing his words carefully as he spoke in a rational manner. "Bill will not be a full werewolf. The cases are completely-"

"But I don't care either, I don't care!" Tonks said, grabbing the front of Remus' robes and shaking them to help prove her point. "I've told you a million times that I love you more than ever!"

Remus sighed, looking anywhere but at Tonks.

"And I've told you a million times that I am too old for you...too poor...too dangerous..."

Tonks did not look very pleased with this reply, and sent a desperate glance towards the others in the room.

Molly appeared to have caught this look, and gave a sad smile as she faced Remus.

"I've said all along that you're taking a ridiculous line on this, Remus."

Remus looked up at the ceiling helplessly. Molly was of no help. He was already in a tough position, trying to battle his emotions for Tonks' safety, and no one was defending his line of view.

"I am not being ridiculous," Remus retorted, keeping his voice even as he gestured to the furious girl next to him. "Tonks deserves someone young and whole."

Molly's face held a small smile as she began to rub Bill's forehead subconsciously. Her smile seemed to suggest that Remus was fighting a losing battle, and that definitely was not something Remus wanted to hear.

Arthur's facial expression mirrored that of his wife, much to Remus' infuriation.

"But she wants you. And, after all, Remus, young and whole men don't necessarily remain so."

Tonks couldn't help but feel a bit hopeful.

Remus, on the other hand, looked quite frustrated. He ran a hand through his hair without thinking.

"This...this is not the moment to discuss it...Dumbledore is dead..."

Remus tried to avoid everyone's gaze, but found himself sending a hopeless glance in McGonagall's direction, who seemed to have a knowing look upon her face.

She shrugged.

"Dumbledore would have been happier than anybody to think that there was a little more love in the world," said McGonagall curtly, in such a way that signified that the conversation was over.

Remus stared incredulously at McGonagall, internally cursing her. Everyone was right. He was being stupid, and he knew it. Even Sirius had known it, for Merlin's sake!

When Hagrid walked into the room, blubbering about Dumbledore, Remus took the opportunity to motion to Tonks, who was looking rather triumphant at the moment, to come out of the room with him.

Tonks' smile faded and was suddenly replaced with the realization of what she had just done. She mentally prepared an apology in her head. She must've embarrassed Remus so much...

Remus stopped a little while away from the Hospital Wing and simply looked at Tonks directly into her dark eyes, that were still sparkling despite the night's events.

For the first time, Tonks broke the eye contact and stared down at the floor, seeming rather guilty.

"I'm really sorry, Remus," she suddenly blurted out, on the verge of rambling. "I wasn't thinking! I was so stuck in the moment, I can't control my emotions in the way you do! I was just so jealous of Fleur, she got the man she loved despite what the Weasleys thought, and I really wished that I could have that same-"

Remus cut Tonks off by letting his lips brush over Tonks' gently.

"I've been in quite the dilemma myself," Remus said softly. "Never had such a tough time dealing with my emotions..."

"You don't need to worry. I'll be right by your side when you need me." Tonks could practically see her heart pounding out of her chest. She suspected Remus didn't really have that problem, he _was_ a lot more mature.

"Are you really thinking of marriage, Nymphadora?" Remus asked.

Tonks beamed, not bothering to correct Remus' use of her full name; she had missed it. "...Maybe?"

Remus let his hand brush over his pocket one more time.

"I really love you, you know," Remus said. "And...I feel like I've always known it. I love Nymphadora Tonks."

Tonks wrapped her arms around Remus' neck.

"I love you, so much. I love Remus Lupin," she added, smiling as her hair started to turn pink again.

Remus pulled back, grinning at the sight of Tonks' genuine grin. He took a deep breath and pulled a small box out of his pocket, while Tonks was playing around with her nose. He got down on his knee.

Tonks blinked a few times after reverting her nose back to normal, and found Remus kneeling on the ground.

"Oh. My. Merlin," she said, staring at Remus.

"I want you to know how much I love you, and I don't know how else to say it without presenting you with this. Only this ring has-"

"Oh Merlin, Merlin, Merlin. Don't tell me you've been carrying that thing around _everywhere_? Since when?"

"-some more value to it than you seem to think. It is the only way I can-"

"Oh Merlin. Oh Merlin. It's happening. Oh Merlin, help me."

"...The only way I can express it is by telling you that I want to spend the rest of my-"

"Oh Merlin, Merlin, Merlin. Oh My Merlin. Sweet Merlin."

Remus groaned. "Are you done with calling for Merlin yet? I'm trying to _propose _to you!"

"I'm sorry, Remus," Tonks said genuinely. "Oh Merlin...sorry."

Remus took a deep breath and continued.

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I want you to have my babies, and I...what?"

Tonks shook her head, trying to stifle her laughter, and zipped her mouth with an imaginary zipper.

Remus rolled his eyes, but continued to grin. "I realized the only way to have that is to ask this question. Nymphadora Tonks, will you marry me?"

"Oh Me - Remus! Yes!"

Tonks flung herself into Remus' arms, allowing him to put the ring onto her, and let their lips meet together into one passionate kiss.

**A/N: It's done! I finished a multi-chaptered fic! What did you all think of the ending? Was it fulfilling enough?**

**I decided against the epilogue, because I realized I would rather end it on a happy note rather than sad. The other would have been Teddy reflecting on the battle, and commenting on how the world changed since then. Don't feel like writing that XD because I loved this chapter and am rather proud of the way it turned out, and I wanted to end on this note.**

**I would like to thank all the reviewers who reviewed and followed this story over the course of the time it was written:**

**Lady Elizabeth of New York: I really loved hearing from you, as I absolutely admire you as a writer. The Family He Deserved has always been one of my favourites, so a compliment from you means a whole lot.**

**GabbiGrl: You've reviewed practically every chapter of this story, and I want to let you know how much it means to me (I know, I'm such a poof). Thank you so much for all your reviews.**

**zzz4730: I loved hearing from you, and you've reviewed every single chapter of this story, which I couldn't be more grateful for. You've always been so supportive of my writing, and I really appreciated it. Hearing such compliments from a magnificent writer truly means a lot.**

**Hermione Is My Role Model: Thank you for all your reviews and sticking by this story no matter what. You are a brilliant writer (well on your way to becoming an authour), and I'm so glad you've enjoyed this story.**

**Theamazingsara: I really loved hearing from you. Thank you for your review.**

**remusdora: Thank you so much for your review! It means a lot to me, and I'm glad you enjoyed it.**

**MelodyPond77: Always a pleasure to hear from you, Melody! I'm so glad you reviewed, it makes me so happy, and you're comments are always so supportive. Thanks you so much.**

**XD And that's everyone. Now I'm done being all sappy! I do hope I continue to hear from you all some more in the future.**


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